HELP!!! School Refusal

My 14 y.o keeps 'shutting down' every Friday in school. I'm not quite sure why. But today I had to pick her up early. 

I didn't take the car we would usually take and she got distressed. She explained that the car we took today is really loud and not smooth whilst driving. 

Today in school she refused to do work, eat, drink or even participate in lessons. This happens every Friday but she was refusing and misbehaving, unlike the other Friday's, where she will just shutdown. 

When she got home she wasn't talking to me and blamed me for taking that car and not the other, then there was no food, then she said I was neglecting her. She is now saying she will not go to school on sunny days since she does not like the sun, the warmth or the brightness and it puts her into a negative mood. I need help!!! 

(She only does part time in school). 

Parents
  • it sounds she is quite sensitive to noise and light and heat, like me. I carry sunglasses in my car in case I need them which a bit. I also carry headphones and earplugs everywhere. 

    As for the shutdowns something has changed ( puberty ?)  and she is under extra stress. She could be masking more or struggling with the school work more. I am guessing.   

    I used to shutdown everyday for 30 - 60min,,,  now its once a week tops. I used meditation to reduce my stress levels so I suggest she joins  a Yoga class or a mindfulness class if possible to learn relaxation/ meditative skills

    what is different about Friday ? what classes/teacher does she not like on Friday ?

  • We believe she was masking her autism for many years. She only got diagnosed last year, after moving house, school and areas 2/3 years ago. After that we had many serious issues. She won't wear sunglasses unless she's out on her bike (she's a dedicated road cyclist). She could be under a lot of stress since we are planning to have an extension done soon since we couldn't move house and upset her. We've tried meditation but it doesn't work for her unfortunately. She doesn't go to school on Thursday so could be returning to school on a Friday be an issue? She has Science, P.E, Math and English every Friday which she loves. She does these lessons all week so I'm not sure what the problem is. And with the teachers, she likes them all. I don't know what to do...

  • meditation should work took me 2 years everyday

    a. to get it right

    b before things started to change

    its ok, she/u tried

    get here a good bike, get her into a cycling club that goes into local competitions 

    I am a road cyclist it is so good for her. i love it. I totally switch off.

Reply
  • meditation should work took me 2 years everyday

    a. to get it right

    b before things started to change

    its ok, she/u tried

    get here a good bike, get her into a cycling club that goes into local competitions 

    I am a road cyclist it is so good for her. i love it. I totally switch off.

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