Talking to parents

Hi there.

I'm 16 yers old and I'm pretty sure that I've got Asperger's Syndrome and I've already found a psychologist who would asess me. The problem is that I don't know how I could tell my parents about that. Have you got any idea? What would you do?

Looking forward to some answers
Loony

  • Hi,  as others say, do write down facts and observations, even photos if you want. Is there any other family member who you feel close enough to confide in first?  Failing that, any teacher or someone in a similar capacity? 

  • This can be very complicated.    

    What sort of things cause you lean towards the Asperger's?     Your parents may be resistant to a diagnosis - after all, you are ok to them - you've always been the same - so suddenly announcing you're a bit different may not be accepted.    If you have any odd quirks, they may just brush it off as 'you being you'.   

    Additionally, I've noticed that these things tend to run in families - do either of your parents seen to fit the criteria?      If yes, and they are undiagnosed, they may be more resistant to your diagnosis because you're the same as them and they are sure that thjey're  'ok'.

    Additionally, as parents, they may see you as their perfect child - so accepting the responsibility of producing something 'faulty' may not sit well with them - it can cause all sorts of guilt and regret as they will worry for you and your future.

    If I were you, I'd carry on with the assessment - but some may ask for input from your parents to describe your early life - and if they are in total denial, their normalising and diminishing of any of your odd behaviours can muddy a diagnosis.

    Good luck - I hope you get more replies to your post.

  • Hi Wave 

    have you completed any online assessments to provide ‘evidence’ of your suspicions? What about writing a letter to your parents to explain how you’ve felt over the years and why you want to proceed with diagnosis?

    As a parent my first thoughts are for the well-being of my children and how to help them navigate life’s problems. It’s my duty, responsibility and what I am committed to doing for them.

    What’s your relationship with your parents like?