Living with the in laws

Im 31 and have just been diagnosed with aspergers and I’m living with the in laws(saving for a mortgage). I’ve made the mistake of telling them of my diagnosis, I was explains to the mother in law about my lack of compassion and that I don’t consiously feel love(but obviously do as I’m still with my wife, care about her and got help so I could try and better myself for her) to which she replied if she knew this before we go married she wouldn’t of aloud it. 

Well I told my wife straight after this happened, she text her dad who then got hold of the mom which resulted in everyone getting pissed off. 

We were supposed to have sat down that evening to talk about it(of which I was dreading as you can prob understand) it never happened. 

So I text mothe in law the next day to ask if we could just forget about as it was too much on an already full plate for my wife and to just be civil. 

Well 3 days later, no one is speaking to each other, my insecurities are going haywire and I feel as isolated as ever, I haven’t felt like this since I went to do my gcse’s In a year of 500+ people of which not one spoke to or aknoleged me!

Anyway I just wanted to vent and any advice would be appreciated or just someone to talk to, to know I’m not alone would be very helpful. And if someone could by me a house that would help to lol. 

Parents Reply
  • I’ve realised some people are open to it, even if they don’t understand they are willing to learn. Then other are just ignorant and insensitive ie mother in law lol

    Yes, I've had everything from complete acceptance and genuine interest in wanting to know more, through to thinking I'm just an excuse-maker with a "trendy" fictional diagnosis who's desperate to avoid responsibility or pass the buck. I'd give my right arm for a radar that could tell me which was which; every once in a while I get a bad reaction from someone I would never have expected it from.

    I wish I had some advice for you, but I've always kept people so much at arms length that the consequences could never be so upsetting (I had a girlfriend for a few weeks once!)  I'm not recommending that's what you do, of course. Where mother-in-law is concerned, you can never be sure whether she always thought you were "not good enough for her baby" and is just looking for a peg to hang it on; in which case she'd have found something in the end anyway. I really hope you can get things sorted out, especially with your wife.

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