About the "How are you?" question

It is a question asked to which no one who asks it wants to know the answer.

i usually say something like "I'll do", much to the consternation of neurotypicals. A work colleague many years ago used to give a shopping list of her ailments every time she was asked. 

A book of etiquette I read once  said that the answer to it is to reply the same. So "How do you do" should be answered with "How do you do?" which makes no sense at all and is merely exchanging breath. 

 Different cultures have different ways of greeting besides verbal. Westerners shake hands, give a 'high five' or a Glasgow kiss depending whether they like the person or not. Other cultures may bow, rub noses or stick their tongues out. My preference is just a simple nod and a "Hello". No insincerity in making someone else think I am in the least interested in their health.

Because in most cases I am not!

Having been born and brought up in Glasgow, many moons ago, I can say with some authority that a Glasgow kiss isn't considered a 'Greeting' even in Glasgow!! I think the only time I ever saw it deployed as one was by Begbie in 'Trainspotting' (the original one, haven't seen the new one so I've no idea if his manners improved in the interim). 

I watched and enjoyed Trainspotters but I don't remember what a Glasgow kiss involves! Remind me....

No, he wasn't! Scarily, he reminded me of an ex of mine. I wouldn't like to meet him again on a dark night either! 

Well my cats head butt me. But that's different I guess. I seem to remember that Begbie was not the kind of person you would want to meet on a dark night

Headbutting someone! So rarely an appropriate greeting but I suppose there may be times where's it's prudent or expedient to deploy it as one   : )    

Headbutting someone! So rarely an appropriate greeting but I suppose there may be times where's it's prudent or expedient to deploy it as one   : )    

No, he wasn't! Scarily, he reminded me of an ex of mine. I wouldn't like to meet him again on a dark night either! 

Well my cats head butt me. But that's different I guess. I seem to remember that Begbie was not the kind of person you would want to meet on a dark night