18_09_17.....For those that have lost the thread....mis-wired ramblings....short circuit!

This is all getting far too complicated for me.  I can't keep up.  Sorry.  I find some of these multiple-nested, multiple-reply threads really hard going. 

Sorry Tom.... I am causing too much disruption to things..

going to lie low for a while...

hope your Monday was ok...

Now now less of that Ellie,we are just a bit tired!we are still here talking,nobody makes us,we choose to be here even when feeling a bit low,so all in all it cheers us up.

Tom your not supposed to keep up,we reckon after about twenty replies everything goes doodley wibble.

Nice to see you tom.

my dad and I are very similar we feel about it each other  but can't talk about it to each other....always so awkward.

no word from my mum for 3 yrs now x

I just worry about you Spotty......you are in such a deep hole that my arms aren't long enough to reach you down there!

Old tools have quality and history,made to last,well engineered,modern tools are cheap and don't do a very good job.throw away society.

It amazes me how few men know nothing about mechanics or engineering? I am in my mind an engineer,mechanic,I know techniques that mean I can make and mend things, I can design and construct pretty much anything mechanical,I would love to be able to paint like you.I have no ability to free hand?anything in my world is geometrical,As a young boy,(one of my nine memories)in infant school,I was at the far end of class away from the teacher and other kids,I had full use of all the toys and colouring equipment,I was sat on the floor trying to draw a car,I got very frustrated that I couldn't find an item with the correct curved corner to draw round for the cars windows.So every part of my drawing was a mix of objects drawn round,no freehand lines at all. I was very meticulous with my shapes, quite why I was on my own I do not know? I have tried so hard to draw and paint but there is no link between my eye to brain to hand coordination.

still we each have our abilities and autism seems to bless us with unique abilities,perfection for me.

()()xx

I would enjoy being a fly on the wall in your workshop, love your respect and faith in old tools. Always loved old tools even when I have no idea what they are for, I just like them.

My Dad was/is engine obsessed, he gave me tools along with my Morris Minor convertible, I needed them especially the feeler gauges as it would break down really soon after the points were changed and I had to adjust them. I don't remember the details but it was fun at the time. 

I'm not in touch with my Dad really now and it is interesting that this ASD crap shines a light on why, pretty sure that he has it and probably my Grandad too.

You know where you are with tools. () x

I have been painting an adjustable spanner eighteen inches long and old style.i de rust,file,sand to shiny metal,sharpen the edges,then high light the recesses in the handle,I chose a aquamarine kind of colour,green/blue like the sea.next I will highlite the tiny little numbers on it,patience and a steady hand,finest brush which is basically a few bristles.I know it all sounds boring but I bring these abandoned relics into smart good looking functional tools,and of coarse old tools are like me? Made of better material,more rugged,made to last and go on and on and on Lol.

Also restored a compound vice,used for milling,re assembled it tonite after making two new bits.did them on my lathe.aluminium stock,turned,hole bored,securing pin hole drilled.painted myford grey.

I am impatient waiting for the paint to dry,I need to paint both sides and it will run if I turn it over,so can't paint till tomorrow.

I need your artistic ability to mix colours,I haven't a clue.

I didn't think you would block me. I have had a few problems recently.keypad freezing,no use of numerical part,no capitals,strange as iPad usually bullet proof.

nite nite and you are far from boring,big hug ()x

Of course I wouldn't/ haven't blocked you Lone, sounds like the technology is ganging up on you!

As an artist I'm quite familiar with watching paint dry, sometimes it's quite exciting,  that must make me really sad.

oh seems to be working now,I wasn't thinking you had blocked me!just strange is all. X() 

Hi spotty,every time I try to reply to you my keypad pops up and then disappears again,can you block someone from replying to you? Anyway nice to hear from you,

Just finished painting 23:16. Would do more but watching paint dry is as boring as it's supposed to be.

take care all,nite nite ()x

Ellie, I've been busy obsessing over acoustic bass guitars to divert myself from lostness and unhappiness and that is why I've been absent. Please don't think that you will be rejected, we all have that fear, you can leave the mask in the box here when you feel like it. You are funny but you don't have to entertain us unless you want to. We are interested in you for you. Failure to make sense I think... x

Nite nite My lovelies,sweet dreams, I'm off out the shed,more painting to keep the mind focused,time is 22:29. Early yet Lol.

()()()()xxxx

And Spotty x 

And you ()x 

Sweet dreams xxx 

Time to snuggle under the duvet.

Haha Well he's very cute really as is Pooh 

This thread is turning into a poo/Pooh fest! LOL

Sounds like you are are having lovely time in your shed Lone. My guinea and I watch soppy stuff most of the time and mysteries at others. And he behaves like guineas do ... poo a lot! 

Hi Ellie I am not stopping!halfway through painting something amongst other things,shed stuff/tool resto,what a surprise.

Anyway was hoping to bump into you and all the other nice people who frequent this play area, I am sad that you are still in that hole! Seems your mask is slipping a little? Well why not let it slip off further? Would be nice to see the real Ellie, well you did say grab another mask to join the show, I imagine a mask free ellie will be interesting and maybe not what we imagined but hey we all have masks so when you feel right just let it slip a little,I will catch you if needs be, right paintbrush going hard so catch up later.

missy I hope your guinea is behaving sat on your lap,what films does it enjoy most?

big hugs all and catch ya laters,()()()()xxxX

Hello Ellie. Maybe you are tired from the full on week and being a bit hard on yourself. Being hard on yourself is easy for all of us we are very practised at it and we also run out of social oomph very easily and then take people's quietness as a rejection or reflection on ourselves rather than it just being a quiet time. I have fear of rejection or abandonment too. It's not a nice feeling at all. Please don't put your mask back on here we like you just as you are. You are fine on here. We are all in a "funny" headspace at the moment .so please keep on hanging on here even if we are not chatty all of the time. I'm feeling most frustrated because my lack of energy and aches and pains are preventing me from doing things I want to do. Including seeing my niece before she goes away for several months. At the moment I am watching back to back YouTube movies with my guinea pig on my lap.  I try to keep calm but sometimes the fear of things not improving gets to me. So very light films are ok and all I can manage for today. It gets lonely looking after oneself all the time ( or not) but please take care of yourself Ellie. Do one something just for you which makes you feel ok. 

Sorry Spotty..I'll jog on and leave you alone. - sorry

I am not in the right head space for this at the moment.....slumped in my hole AGAIN before I am able to come out and grab another mask to join the show.

i constantly hit this wall that I hit a slump and want to reach out to others but can't articulate myself or what I want or need from them.....I have a constant fear of rejection...and seem to micro-manage it to a tee that that is exactly what happens.

sorry Peeps... 

Sorry Spotty..I'll jog on and leave you alone. - sorry

I am not in the right head space for this at the moment.....slumped in my hole AGAIN before I am able to come out and grab another mask to join the show.

i constantly hit this wall that I hit a slump and want to reach out to others but can't articulate myself or what I want or need from them.....I have a constant fear of rejection...and seem to micro-manage it to a tee that that is exactly what happens.

sorry Peeps... 

Happy Tuesday Missy and Spotty.....hope you both have a good day x

Hi lovely

no marks over stepped - don't panic.....just tired last night and went to bed early.  You ok?

Not stupid at all.. it's more relevant than you can imagine so sentiment much appreciated. contributing is voluntary it's hard to keep up with it all sometimes I just ignore them if they have replies unless interested. Hope OH health issues not too serious but must be enough if they are bothering you. 

Think I will wend my way to my lovely duvet no heating on so it's warmer there! Goodnight Spotty x

Uneventful, I did some reading around here, there seems to be a lot to read, but wasn't feeling very contributory. OH has health issues at the moment too which are preying on my mind. Another day tomorrow like you said. Hope you have a comfortable night if that isn't a stupid thing to say. x

()x Thank you but not sure what to say.. 

How was your day? 

Whatever you may think of yourself Missy, you are a trooper and a very kind hearted one. () x

X()

Thanks Spotty. Yes it was though I tried listen. Think maybe start again tomorrow. The social services conversation completely threw me out of kilter all day. 

I doubt you overstepped the mark, are you talking about the other teacher post? I found that overwhelming and I would imagine Ellie would too. I'm sure Tom/Katkins will still be around somehow. x

.I'm very sorry Ellie did I overstep the mark ? I feel like I have sent you further into your burrow. Please come out. It's too quiet . 

It's been a very strange day and feeling unsettled. But I have started a new thread for us if we want it. Spoke to social serVices but didn't seem to understand me nothing new there. Dad's ok for another 6mths so another checkup then. Tom has left us again. It's 9 already and everyone is very quiet. Hope you are all ok. 

Easier to look after others than it is to look after oneself quite often.. and yes much easier to offer help than accept it or see answers for myself. X

You have to care for and take care of you too, amazing how easy that is to see in relation to other people! ()x

Thank you. And you too. I think I am just like all of you concerned about other people on the forum. Hopefully I'll feel a bit brighter in the morning x

Look after yourself if you can Missy. x

Ellie I am being bold.. there is a new post by a lady who needs your help as think you have current things in common.. Simetimes it's easy to miss the new posts. And I must go to bed. Hope you have a good week ahead. 

Watch out for the woozles as Pooh would say and look after yourself - promise x

Not got sniffles. Just aching all over, woozy, tired etc thought it might be the paint fumes but possibly not. Trying to gather myself to collect things to go home again. 

She's amazeballs...how are the sniffles Missy? 

She does look rather jolly doesn't she..