Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I'm 28F and I've never been in a relationship. I'm asexual and have never experienced sexual attraction, so any attempts I've ever made into dating have fallen flat when it became clear I didn't want to do anything beyond kissing and cuddling. I've tried some ace dating sites but I struggle with making conversation on there, and I think it's because the people I'm speaking to are neurotypical and don't understand that I don't like to go out and socialise as much as most people my age. Has anyone ever tried any sort of group or site aimed at matching people on the spectrum? I would like to try and see if I could find someone that understands my differences a bit better.
As an older gay man (53) myself, I would urge caution with online “dating” apps and websites - in my 23 years living in the U.K. alone (before my diagnosis in 2021) when I lived in Ireland and especially during my teens in the 80’s I was never really accepted by other gay men in particular, but then here in the U.K. I started to notice a very toxic (and dangerous) gay “hookup” culture that was never what I was ever after and most gay men are so cliquish, they only want sex hookups on the first date, obsessed with youth and beauty, they think that friendships and/or relationships can develop out of a hookup (but hooking up with a friend can ruin a perfectly good friendship) and so 18 years ago, I simply gave up on gay friendships let alone relationships and I’m not into “hooking up” with random people - for the same reason I don’t go cruising or cottaging as I’m not that desperate for sex, nor do I like the experience of being high on drugs nor drunk, as I don’t like losing control of all of my faculties as it’s not classy nor dignified, nor is it having self-respect