Newly Diagnosed 30 year old - ASD report next steps

Absolutely not harsh at all, thank you for sharing! I have my therapist next week, and my access to work coach in September which should help me go through and process more

Thank you, I definitely feel more that way after having some time to sit on it. I think I just found it jarring to see everything all at once - including things I hadn't even realised. It identifies a few other things that I wasn't aware of but am now self-conscious of (though I'm working to move through that). 

I've been reading a few books which have been really helpful in improving my own knowledge and understanding and reinforcing that kindness toward myself. 

They are strange things, these reports. Mine described my quirks as "differences". I didn't mind it too much because I was so relieved that I was officially autistic. I would have thought I was a crazy alien otherwise.

I've been sitting on mine for around two months now. This forum and joining a local group were my next steps.

I obviously don't know your report, but I hope that you aren't seeing it as a list of things to change about yourself, and more about finding ways to accommodate them better.

This was intense for me too. I let it sit there for a week until I met with my therapist to go over it. The best myself and my therapist came up with was “this is what they were supposed to do, that’s their job. It isn’t there job to list out all your amazing qualities” excuse me if that sounds harsh, not meaning to ️ 

I loved school, which was perfect for me because it involved accumulating lots of knowledge! Also, praise and merit were tangible: house points, certificates, prizes, etc. 

In adulthood, knowledge and ability seem to be less respected than prejudice and nepotism. It's extremely hard and exhausting to navigate a world in which egos trump rules.

Thanks for checking out the YouTube channel. I'm a lot less po-faced there than I am on this message board!

I completely agree - especially as, at least for me I am able to function and the problems arise when I don't function in the 'right' way. E.g. for me eye contact isn't something explicitly needed to communicate but some people think it's weird if you don't do it as they expect. 

I am also quite amazed. I think a lot of my traits fell by the wayside because I was getting decent marks and in my schooling that's all they really cared about. I found out when I spoke to someone from school I reconnected with who was diagnosed and was very surprised that I found a lot of what they said to be relatable and here we are!

Thanks for explaining - I was double-checking wondering where on Earth I had gotten Neil from! I'll check out your channel

I found it jarring and upsetting to read a report outlining differences as if they were deficiencies. 

I'm amazed that I didn't realise I'm autistic much sooner (I was 41 when I was diagnosed last year). I think this was mainly because I believed in the Rain Man stereotype.

Anyway, keep sharing too.

(P.S. I've just changed my name to the name of my YouTube channel, just in case you wondered why I now have a pseudonym!)

You're welcome! It's great to hear that you're already benefiting from therapy with a knowledgeable and open-minded therapist :)

Many thanks, Neil! 

I certainly empathise with that. While I was feeling pretty self confident (generally) about myself and my diagnosis the report was a bit of a knock. While my assessor was nice, having all my difficulties listed out was quite jarring. Though, it is surprising how I could have ever questioned if I was Autistic!

Thank you for sharing, I'll definitely keep communicating with others. That's what brought me to this forum and I've been glad of the decision so far. 

Congratulations on your autism diagnosis, and welcome to the community. 

I was appalled by my diagnostic report, which made me feel like a defective human being. However, if you've met one autism assessor, you've met one autism assessor - plenty of people have a positive assessment experience.

My number one tip would be to keep communicating with other autistic people, who have quite frankly rescued me.

Many thanks for your warm welcome and advice! 

I'm already in private therapy (having had quite terrible luck with the NHS) and thankfully my therapist has a decent level of knowledge - and is willing to learn more! I've seen that book recommended by a few people so will definitely check it out. 

Hi Pip - congratulations on your diagnosis and welcome to the community!

The NAS has a freshly revamped set of resources covering the post-diagnosis period. If you haven't already seen them, I suggest reading through their articles here:

> After Diagnosis

Like mine, your report might recommend therapy or counselling, for which your GP may be able to make a referral. In preparation for this, I found this book extremely helpful:

The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy - Steph Jones

In this candid, witty and insightful exploration into therapy, Steph Jones uses her professional and lived experiences as a late diagnosed autistic woman and therapist, as well as consulting therapists from across the world and tapping into the autistic community, to create the ultimate autistic survival guide to therapy.

You may be ready for therapy / counselling immediately, or prefer to let the dust settle first. I felt that I first needed a few months to work through the emotional dysregulation that can be common for us to feel immediately after our diagnosis (perhaps including experiencing some backward-looking anger, grief, etc).

That being said, depending on the waiting time in your area, it might still be best to seek a referral straight away.