Losing the fight for belonging

I am feeling burnt out from trying to find other ND people and coming up with nothing.  I attended a local ND group but I felt invisible and they could care less I was there or not from my point of view.

I am discouraged from questioning the issues of adulthood and the challenges of neurodivergence everyone would rather tip-toe around like relationships, independence and jobs.

I even tried Bumble but it was dead, and everyone was the same and felt fake so I quit.  I'm reluctant to try any other apps.

If things were different I would have had top marks in school, more qualifications, a loving partner and a job that doesn't make me want to top myself.

But I don't.  Instead I languish in unemployment, self loathing and loneliness as the days go by and I struggle to find my place in the world.