Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi a load of my posts haven’t been positive and some of my behaviours towards people have been disgusting the burner phone for example. But I have been getting help and I’ve been doing a lot of self healing as well like going for walks reading books and doing some online therapy. I am starting to feel better university over and done with I’m looking for work at the moment and I have got my own house my dad has given it to me as my mum has passed on and my dad has moved away no morgage to pay or anything. On Friday my dad coming to see me and my dog Lucy is coming back to live with me. The two friends with the burner phone incident both know and it’s only Rikki who has forgiven me fully and our relationship has improved massively. Sadly my other friend is not as forgiving and things are still extremely tense. I will say things are getting better for me I take my medication I’m receiving help and I’m doing more things like board game groups, circus skills and so on. Last Sunday I actually spun a staff that was on fire for the first time even on the beach and my confidence has grown hopefully it will continue to do so.
My life is a living hell, punctuated by maniacal bliss.
I am happy to hear things are getting better for you. Hopefully things continue to get better for you
There's a book from the 90's l like. it's called How To Survive With Aspergers Syndrome by Marc Segar. He makes the salient point that every time you find new friends you think things will be different and you won't end up excluding yourself ,or being excluded by them, but then it happens all over again. You need a very thick skin and I'm not ashamed to admit that I don't have one. I'm sensitive and a raw nerve.
I do not know your history because I am new-ish to this site. But if I may offer a small ray of hope. You and Nadia are still talking! This is good! Even if it is difficult. If you have let her down in some way then it may take a while to heal. i think that you still talk is a good sign.
It will eventually I’ve had some dark times in my life but I’ve overcome them.
Lucy is an old dog now she will be 13 soon but still has life in her. She is a sweet old girl who loves everyone and asks for a fuss from everyone lol.
Yeah I really regretted doing that and it was slowly eating me up inside and I told my 2 friends Nadia who I used as the pawn and Rikki who thought it was Nadia messaging him. Rikki took it extremely well never told me off or anything. Nadia on the other hand we not getting on at all can’t talk to her these days without us arguing. But apart from that I’m just enjoying the summer looking for work and I’m enjoying spending time with Rikki and my other friends.
Glad to hear things have improved, I remember the "burner phone" incident was really traumatic for you, sounds like it's getting better slowly. we all make mistakes and errors of judgment, it's normal, but I know us autistic folks seem to be impacted and dwell far more on them than the "norm" would, we're a self conscious bunch!
Really is great to hear you sounding positive!
This sounds good. I always know that anyone who loves dogs is never beyond help. I don't have one, but I regularly look after my sister-in-law's dog when they go away. I am looking after her in two weeks!
I don't think we've spoken but I'm pleased to hear things can improve for people. Maybe one day for me too.