Published on 12, July, 2020
I by chance unexpectedly about two and a half months ago met this absolutely beautiful man - he is a man not without his quirks but if anything I find those endearing and quite cute to be honest. We instantly had a vibe and appeared to like each other, constant eye contact, smiles and finding excuses to be in one another's presence and,or text msg's - he even unnecessarily called me one day, which I totally loved that hearing his voice during my work day, I was on a natural heigh the rest of the day (good lord listen to me I sound like a bloody teenager lol).
Please Note: I apologies upfront for all of the writing that is coming (thus I will try to do some dot point too) summarisation has never been my strong suit sadly lol...
There are a lots of bits and pieces and even though it;s only been like 10-11 weeks a lot has happened but for now I'll keep it brief - I believe that this gorgeous man may have Aspergers, Autism and be on the spectrum but is extremely high functioning or, or he may just be so extremely intelligent that the things I have noticed are just quirks I am not sure. Also if he is on the spectrum I am unsure if diagnosed but doesn't accept or didn't want to tell me or that he hasn't been diagnosed.
I am neurotypical however I am beyond understanding, caring, compassionate and honestly if he is on the spectrum and he would of been upfront with me it would of saved some missed opportunities of beautiful conversations and experiences AND would of prevented me from getting very unforcedly out of the blue unexpected hurt by him. I have a 19+ year caring, nursing and NDIS/NDA background and I am just a passionate caring person in general so am extremely equipped to deal with this if told the truth and given the opportunity and my own choice to do so.
I am sending out this post for help (those on the spectrum and those who are in relationships with or been in long term relationship etc);
To a) see if my thoughts that he is on the spectrum are possibly correct
b) if so what other traits that I have missed besides what already notice should I look out for
c) things were beautiful for weeks and things happened that were so wonderful but now he did things and said complete opposite and we have now lost communication but I wish to open up the communication back but without being to over whelming if my thoughts are right that he is on the spectrum and I need help.
Neurodiversity is big business - everybody is on the spectrum. I wonder why there are no resources for people in genuine need.
Bored and irritable said:Neurodiversity is big business - everybody is on the spectrum. I wonder why there are no resources for people in genuine need.
I am trying to understand this statement.
Are you implying that people are being diagnosed (or self identifying) inappropriately/incorrectly (as obviously everyone isn't autistic)?
The subject line of your message contains 'gorgeous' - a value judgement, no?
Please elaborate on where you feel my comments are unjustified. I have all day. I'm happy to substantiate any arguments I have made. Start by asking me why I have all day.
Well considering my original post nor other comments so far actually haven't given any direct examples of the suspected traits 'quirks' as i described them and haven't actually stated why it is that I thought he may be neurodiverse (not that it matters at all, I like him very much for who he is, who he is i believe is why I do like him so much) as I didn't want to divulge more personal things (even though no identity here) until someone commented with genuine caring and positivity in wanting to assist me/us and paid enough attention to actually note that I hadn't actually stated any what I thought the signs/traits were - THUS i'm not really sure how you can conclude that he is the exact opposite when I haven't even described his quirks as i put it / traits. So how you can come to that conclusion i'm not sure but well done there's the reply you wanted to cure your boredom and irritability, congrats.
Although yes i will agree that the individuality of neurodiverse and the countless traits etc etc does make it widely applicable to lots of people although I believe that's if your looking at it on paper - when applied in person and with individuals it's different I feel.
But yes I can see an aspect of where your original comment is coming from, however your conclusion here is unjustified as the not even a 3rd of the information has been provided - much less the information that would be required for you to draw the conclusion.
P.S. you may be the superficial one here as when I say gorgeous right away you assume it's a remark referring to this mans looks only. In fact I was referring to everything about him quirks and all, I think that he gorgeous for many many reasons.
I am allowed to have and want values and yes I do value his gorgeous character, and behaviors and values that he seems to hold, so yes I have value judged him as I know he has me with some comments (not as positive as mine) he has made as it is human nature to do so and i understand theat.
Hi Debbie,
Yes, precisely that. Other than in a medical context, everybody I have ever talked to about being on the spectrum either has or knows somebody with 'autistic traits'.
If you look at the numbers, more people are in the diagnostic process than would justify it being called an abnormal condition.
Does the person, as described in the original message, sound Autistic to you? To me, he sounds completely the opposite. I'm not for one minute suggesting that those in genuine need shouldn't be given the appropriate help.
But I am making a valid point. However poorly received it is.
Are you able to give me any advice with my situation regarding original post and related comments to my original post please and thank you. P.s. yes I agree Bord & Irritable my be as per the name however yes I think Debbie is correct - not relevant nor correct or productive of a comment. Although each to their own opinion but if we could stay on topic to the post would be much appreciated please and thank you.