Skip to main content
Close Button
Donate
  • Replies 2 replies
  • Subscribers 99 subscribers
  • Views 135 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Newly diagnosed adult female (53yr)

CM
11 days ago

Hi Wave 

so I am newly diagnosed and have not yet told my family ( mum dad and sister) … only my husband and a couple of close friends are aware

im feeling really anxious about telling my family … there is history of sweeping difficult conversations about MH and other stuff under the carpet and never mentioning it again …. 

Any advice or suggestions on how to tell them Grimacing

im not going to do it unless my husband is able to come with me for moral support which he is happy to do 

  • 11 days ago

    You know your parents and sister best. How do you think they will react? And how will you react to them, if they react differently? Do you have to tell them? I know your diagnosis is important to you, but unless it helps them understand YOU, what would be your motivation for telling them?

    I am 52, was diagnosed in February, and probably won't tell my mum or sister. I suspect mum is autistic, it would serve no purpose to tell her, and she certainly wouldn't consider doing anything about getting a diagnosis herself, so I can't see any value in telling her. My sister is a drama queen and will make anything I tell her about me, all about her. I don't have the energy to cope with her crises. So I have told my friends, my work, but nobody in my family. I just don't have the energy.

  • 11 days ago

    Welcome aboard!

    I'm almost 50 and went through diagnosis in Feb this year.

    Similar in that I told very close friends and obviously my wife, but then struggled a bit with telling others.

    I ended up telling my parent mid argument on WhatsApp about something they were being odd about, so didn't really go to plan. Later that week i went to see them ans talked about It more. It doesn't get spoken about that much since but I think they get it.

    Best advice I can give is to do it when it feels right for you in a way you're comfortable with and don't have too many expectations.

    people will react in their own way and might need time to digest and understand what you've told them. You might not get the supportive response you want and deserve immediately. They may well not know how to offer the support they want to offer, which could be in an attempt to be tactful. Unexpected reactions don't necessarily mean they don't care.

    Plus there's the double empathy theory to factor in.

    Good luck, hope it all goes ok!