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Holidaying with neurotypical friends

Katie
3 months ago

Morning everyone, 

I’m going on a long weekend holiday with two of my friends. We’ve been friends for years and although we are quite different, we’ve always got along well. They both know I’m autistic. But we have never spent more than a day together and I’m a bit anxious about the whole weekend and being overwhelmed. 

Is it really self centred to just prewarn them that I may just need some time in my own head towards the end of the day and for them not to take it the wrong way? I already know the lack of routine will be a bit of an issue as they are very laid back and don’t make plans Sweat smile

Anyone else been in this situation? 

  • 3 months ago

    I have friends who know about my autism, I'm sure they would have guessed anyway given were close and spent a lot of time together over the years.

    They're totally fine as a result when I sometimes slope off for a while to decompress after we've spent time together on holiday or days out. 

    If they didn't,  then it'd be hard to not spend that time worrying about what they think, so it's definitely better them knowing.

  • 3 months ago

    Hi, I would be honest with them- you want to make sure all of you have a good time and I think it will help if you tell them about maybe needing some alone time so that you feel comfortable taking it if you need it. Have a great trip!!

  • 3 months ago

    I went to France with someone five years ago. I wouldn't say we were friends - we went to school together, he had the tendency to be pretty vile. We reconnected a few years after and met a few times. The discussion came up and we ended up booking it - I didn't set any boundaries nor think about it too much. I barely spoke to him while we were there, and not at all since. Part of me felt used.

    But anyway - it seems different in your case as at least they're your friends. I don't think it's self centred at all. You should do what you need to, to be able to enjoy it. 

  • 3 months ago

    My advice is to be honest with them, explain that you may need time alone to decompress and for them to not take it the wrong way. If some things need to be done a certain way then it’s just you, being you.