Nvm

Socials can be a nightmare, especially the ones I've thought too much about and thought about too much during.

I spend so much time overthinking on the run up to things. I'm not sure how to stop that but I know it's a problem. Things are never as "bad" as expected.

I also spend a lot of time during events watching myself and everything else, ensuring that I'm not doing anything that might appear odd. I'm sure if I could relax a bit I'd be better in that respect too.

Sometimes I get caught in the moment for a while and actually enjoy little snippets before returning to overthinking. 

If I'm out with friends who know about my autism it's usually easier, not that anything ever gets said about it or anything changed to allow for it, it's just easier somehow. Problem is very few people do know, so there's a lot of times I'm in situations that aren't comfortable and I barely enjoy, I just "get through them".

A lot of the time it's just sensory overload that gets me, which then makes me anxious and uncomfortable. 

I know If I do too many at once it's not good, spreading things out helps recharge my autistic battery in-between.

Drinking is another issue, I do it as it makes me feel slightly better at the time, plus there's the social pressure , but then horrific for days after with anxiety which manifests as angry outbursts and upset.

So in summary I know what the issues are I just ain't sure how to fix them yet. I'm working on it, it's one of my priorities to fix. 

Socials can be a nightmare, especially the ones I've thought too much about and thought about too much during.

I spend so much time overthinking on the run up to things. I'm not sure how to stop that but I know it's a problem. Things are never as "bad" as expected.

I also spend a lot of time during events watching myself and everything else, ensuring that I'm not doing anything that might appear odd. I'm sure if I could relax a bit I'd be better in that respect too.

Sometimes I get caught in the moment for a while and actually enjoy little snippets before returning to overthinking. 

If I'm out with friends who know about my autism it's usually easier, not that anything ever gets said about it or anything changed to allow for it, it's just easier somehow. Problem is very few people do know, so there's a lot of times I'm in situations that aren't comfortable and I barely enjoy, I just "get through them".

A lot of the time it's just sensory overload that gets me, which then makes me anxious and uncomfortable. 

I know If I do too many at once it's not good, spreading things out helps recharge my autistic battery in-between.

Drinking is another issue, I do it as it makes me feel slightly better at the time, plus there's the social pressure , but then horrific for days after with anxiety which manifests as angry outbursts and upset.

So in summary I know what the issues are I just ain't sure how to fix them yet. I'm working on it, it's one of my priorities to fix. 

Autisician said:

I know what the issues are I just ain't sure how to fix them yet. I'm working on it, it's one of my priorities to fix. 

I can relate so much to this, all of what you shared honestly. I also have to do breaks and space out busy time in the ways you were saying, I agree about that recharge feeling even stepping away for a few minutes can provide. Being social really does feel like my energy is being actively sucked away from me. I too feel more comfortable with friends and family that do know about my autistic tendencies, even if not much changes about how they socialize with me. I think it's nice to have that communication line open, so if something happens you can explain it's part of how your mind works. This especially helps me communicate with my husband as he knows my grouchy moods aren't always correlated with the situation at hand, it could be entirely something I'm thinking about. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. We aren't broken, just simply in need of more maintence than others. That's how I view living with ASD on a personal level.