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3 years on Thursday since my mum died

Rach91
4 months ago

on Thursday it will be three years since my mum died and I’m finding it hard. Luckily I am going over my friend Rikki’s in the evening we are going to have pizza might play on his ps4 or snuggle up with him and watch a film and drink hot chocolate and eat cupcakes hopefully I can make my chocolate orange ones. It’s nice to have a supportive friend that can keep me company in the evening. I miss my mum every day and I wish she didn’t have to had surgery but she would have died at a later date if she didn’t have it. Truth is I find it hard especially on Mother’s Day and Christmas. Her birthday hasn’t been as bad as the last 2 summers I’ve been over in the states working in a summer camp but this year I won’t be going as I need to find work in the U.K. as I am almost finished with my degree. I’m lucky to have friends that care and will be there for me and Rikki understands as he lost his mum to a heart condition a few years before I lost my mum to a heart condition. Sadly though I can’t put flowers down on Thursday where my mums ashes were scattered as Rikki car is in the garage I don’t drive myself nor do my other friends and catching a bus there isn’t an option. Hopefully I can do that at a later date. 

  • 4 months ago

    I lost my mum 4 years ago, and it creates a void that cannot be filled. But I have found that, over time, the memories hurt less and bring more joy. They live on in us, in the habits we picked up and looks we inherited. They never really die. 

  • 4 months ago
    Rach91 said:
    I miss my mum every day and I wish she didn’t have to had surgery but she would have died at a later date if she didn’t have it.

    I always found it reslly helpful to take the time to celebrate the life of a loved one when they are gone. If you can do this to remember all the positives about them and build that warm and fuzzy feeling then it can make the loneliness of missing them a little easier to bare.

    If you think about it, would she want you to be miserable? I doubt it. Do happy things and keep her in your thoughts when doing this and it can really help.

    Rach91 said:
    Sadly though I can’t put flowers down on Thursday where my mums ashes were scattered as Rikki car is in the garage I don’t drive myself nor do my other friends and catching a bus there isn’t an option. Hopefully I can do that at a later date. 

    I don't think she would mind - that fact that you are still going to lengths to do this for her would make her happy I'm sure.

    If you do go, remember to tell her about the good things going on in your life, your hopes, dreams and ambitions and it helps feel like you are keeping a part of her close to you and a part of your life.