Published on 12, July, 2020
Is What does this actally mean in practice, not the dictionary definition, but for those of us so labelled? Although no ones ever told me I'm high functioning, I guess I am.
Is it a helpful term or unhelpful?
Does it express our experiences properly or reflect away from them?
Is this a term more helpful to NT's than us?
Personally I find the term a bit insulting as well as divisive and dismissive.
It conjures up a view of something like a superpower to a lot of people, I don't think many people realise that it means "outwardly appearing to be fine while you're struggling like hell on the inside to keep it up"
The more we mask the more people assume we're ok, if we're trying to hide something and we're successful, we can't blame people for not noticing it.
I've been told "nobody would ever know you were autistic unless you wanted them to" , "that's because they can't feel my anxiety and distress and if I'm masking well they won't see it either"
I don't like this idea of autistic people having some kind of super power either, I find that just as disabling, as having next to no power, to me that implies comic book levels of defiance of the law of science etc. I have a good memory, I have trained my memory, its something that has kept me sane over the years when people have tried to twist, distort and deny things I know have happened. This is not a super power, its a learnt ability. I can cook well and have an excellent palet for tastes, smells and textures, so do many others. I think we all have things were good or very good at.
I think a lot of people get upset whent they find out I'm autustic, I'm often met with disbelief, because I look and act normal, male autists can be quite dismissive of me as a female autist.