Published on 12, July, 2020
Some love being autistic, I personally feel neutral about it most of the time and sometimes negative.
Here you can share your struggles and dislike for autism.
I'm gonna share too, though I'm sleep deprived right now and might seem drunk lol.
I wish I was not different on so many levels including autism. I wish I had friends or liked socializing. I wish I didn't struggle with lying and such. I wish people would stop telling me I'm rude or I should smile or whatever, I haven't hurt anyone by my face, leave me be! I wish I didn't have autism inertia and could be more in sync with the world. Wish I didn't get tired so easily.
Guess that's it for now, huh?
Also, wanted to say that just the act of sharing and being listened to has helped me multiple times on this website, sharing things I had never shared, so thank you!
Sometimes, when trying to co-mingle, it will fail if it's the wrong venue, wrong people, or it will be a blast if it's right venue on with the right people.
Suffice to say I would not trade the joy and happiness, the 'zone' of total absorption I feel when I'm immersed in the seas of special interests and my very unique mind and body. I am as I am and I celebrate it. I will get social situations wrong, I sometimes get them right but I always feel good about my self.
I wonder how allistics enjoy their hobbies/interests then. I never thought I experience enjoyment in a different way too.
lol, as I was typing this, a classmate talked to me and I didn't hear/understand anything and just nodded and made noise. Is not hearing people common in autistics too? I always feel I'm missing opportunity for connection.