Published on 12, July, 2020
Does anyone here find talking to people hard work? I feel like my self talk is constantly working over time trying parse what the other person is saying, and then I'm telling myself that they may be trying to tell me something different or that a smile or facial expression can mean loads of things. Sometimes I have to tell myself to just listen. If I am in a group of people it's terrible, like people are speaking in tongues and there too many conversations going on at the same time.
I had the first part of an autism assessment recently and haven't been back for the second part because they kept saying I was too verbally fluid and used gesture. Even though if anyone knew me from childhood they would say I was extremely quiet, which I am, unless you engage me in a topic I know about. I think I have fairly limited gestures as opposed to other people aswell.
As an adult in my 40's I think I have managed to learn loads of ways to deal with things I find difficult.
I wondered if anyone else has a similar experience? Debating whether to continue on the diagnosis journey, or take a route that is less NHS.
Some people believe that the only way to manage autism is by means of ultra strict Milltary style discipline, not permitting people with autism to live alone without a live in carer and constantly screaming commands at an autistic person to be quiet and keep their opinions to themselves because it’s just the dysfunction talking, that they must be constantly reminded forcefully that they are always deemed wrong by default and incapable of common sense as in “cop yourself on” which they see as “tough love - for thier own good” - some people, even in this day and age, still believe that autism is caused by not enough, hard enough and frequent enough corporal punishment in childhood to root out any and all inappropriate and dysfunctional behaviour in childhood