Published on 12, July, 2020
The good old days, eh?
Older generations, say from mid 30's onwards, speak of how things were better in the good old days.
I believe that I have been blessed with a good life, with many great experiences. Oh course there were experiences that were not so great.
The thing is, when I look back on those experiences, the times, the places, the things I did - I should be grateful.Yes, I am grateful, but I am also filled with what can be an overwhelming sadness.Sadness that those days are long gone, the World has changed, I've gotten older (53), my health has declined.
Sure, you don't have to be autistic to have those mournful thoughts for what once was, but does being autistic make it that much harder?
I'm 27 now and do miss the good old days - i.e. when I was a child. Life was easy, carefree and the days felt endless and were always fun! Adulthood has been a worrisome time for me. I've had mental breakdowns, I'm watching my parents grow older and getting ill, and I don't enjoy life anymore, not like I used to anyway. Undoubtedly my good old days of childhood had bad moments too but there was more good than bad - adulthood is definitely more bad than good!
I think being autistic definitely makes it harder. For me I've noticed that the older I'm getting the more difficult I find life. My life consists of films, meltdowns, anxiety and frequent hospital admissions. I frequently wonder what life would be like if I wasn't autistic.