Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm not a fan of them. Even as a little girl I never got excited for my birthday, in fact the weeks leading up to it were always filled with dread and this is something that's never changed.
My birthday is next month and I'm already dreading it. People keep asking me what I want, should we do a party, am I excited...
It must sound like I'm not grateful, I actually am grateful for the thought and care but as with every year I just want to stay in my room and wait for the day to be over. Everyone fusses and the majority know I don't like my birthday or celebrating but they do it anyway.
If it was a quiet occasion it would be much better and I wouldn't have such a big problem with it but it's never a quiet occasion and by the end of the day I'm always exhausted and nearing a meltdown.
There's still a month to go but I'm anxious already. If I'm really lucky they will forget it this year and I can carry on like normal.
Hate them.
- I don't like the attention focused on me and tend to hide away from people until it's over and old news
- I don't like being pulled out the general routine of day to day for any 'special' activities/treats/parties
- I feel bad/guilty when I struggle to show appreciation and feel like people might think I'm not grateful for gifts or comments wishing happy birthday.
- I don't generally like arbitrary dates, if you do or don't care about me then have that be an all year round thing. For that reasons I don't vibe with any singular dates like valentines, mothers/fathers day, pride month etc.
Werther's Original said: I feel bad/guilty when I struggle to show appreciation and feel like people might think I'm not grateful for gifts or comments wishing happy birthday.
I always am terrible at showing my appreciation for gifts. People expect "Oh wow! Thank you so much, I love it! Ive always wanted one of these!" and they have to be all smiley and use a excited voice. My reaction is blank stare as I try to process what I was even given, then I say "Thanks" and it usually comes out sounding confused as I try to sound excited. Actually if I say thanks right away when I get a gift it probably means I dont care about it because if I did like it, because if I did like it then I would go and play with/use it. I think certain phrases are so overused in society that they dont even have the right meaning anymore. Like people will just say sorry if they start walking where you were, but then how if someone going to know when you really mean sorry or if its just a manners type thing. So I ussually only say please, sorry, thank you, etc when I really mean it (or if I remember to while masking)