Published on 12, July, 2020
My therapist has repeatedly encouraged me to join some kind of club or a meetup group or do a class to get me out of the house and meet people, maybe even make some friends.
I see the point and there are classes I would find interesting, but the thought of going to one of these by myself is just too daunting. I find it difficult not to assume people tend to join these things with a friend and I don’t want to be the weird guy on his own.
Have any of you gone to these things by yourself? Do people really do that?
I've recently been doing this sort of thing. Going to groups and things. It's really challenging and uncomfortably anxiety provoking. Ive in the past couple of months started going to a board games group, volunteering, and going to a men's yoga class/wild swimming group. All of these I've attended alone. You will not be the weird guy on his own. These groups tend to attract other people that are in a similar situation, that they want to meet new people. In every single one of these groups I've went to I met others that were there alone and for the first time also. They too were there to meet people, just like you. I think people with a number of friends are less likely to join these things sometimes becuase, well, they've got their "people" and may be satisfied with the friendships they've got.
If your lucky, you might find groups that are very friendly to new comers. The board games group i attended had one of the organisers greeting to hat the door and explaining how it works if you were new. This group was organised through the "meet up" app. The swimming group also offered to do a "buddy" system for newcomers so it doesn't feel as daunting your first time. Many of these types of groups have new comers in mind.
I compeltley understand how daunting it feels. I came so close to turning and going home jsut as I was entering these things for the first time. I can't say how your experiences will be, but I know from my own experience it has done so much for my confidence and self esteem in being around other people. I would say it's worth a try, much like most things. I would however recommend if you do, then make sure to have a good self care plan/routine afterwards, as regardless of if it goes good or bad, it is pretty exhausting, especially the first couple of times you attend and the anxiety is at its worst.
I hope some of what I've said helps! Please keep us updated if you find yourself trying some of the groups your interested in. We're here to support!
Thanks Euan, that’s really cheered me up and given me hope!
I will keep you updated. I have to make an effort next year.