Authenticity

i just still be me.... if the world rejects me, which i feel it has alot.... then i react how i usually react lol .... usually in a fiery angry escalatory way. but yet that is me authentic, a authentic reaction. dont tone yourself down, if you feel disrespected by a institution or a boss or something and looked down upon react how you feel necessary... to me id make them feel that way, make them feel the way you do, stand my ground as if i count for as many who is against me... if the entire world is against me then i fight as if i am equally a entire world myself so its a equal fight lol the more against you the harder you go, the louder you go.

although this can get you in trouble, but i feel its better to live and die by how you are and your ideals rather than to survive and cave in to others. i tell my boss the absolute truth and opinions, if he doesnt like them he can fire me, others would be scared of saying the stuff i have said to him. but i have sorta a impulsivity or something that makes me not care about survival sometimes so i can blurt things out and get real fiery, then i have a time when i think and have sense and be like.... bruh, if you lose this job you never get one again as it was pure luck getting a job in the first place, which then makes me stressed i guess but i still spartan up and stick to my ideals and views. im transparent honest and blunt and view everyone as a equal human, so yeah this causes issues with authority figures that think their authority makes them count as more than a single human or above any other human.

i just still be me.... if the world rejects me, which i feel it has alot.... then i react how i usually react lol .... usually in a fiery angry escalatory way. but yet that is me authentic, a authentic reaction. dont tone yourself down, if you feel disrespected by a institution or a boss or something and looked down upon react how you feel necessary... to me id make them feel that way, make them feel the way you do, stand my ground as if i count for as many who is against me... if the entire world is against me then i fight as if i am equally a entire world myself so its a equal fight lol the more against you the harder you go, the louder you go.

although this can get you in trouble, but i feel its better to live and die by how you are and your ideals rather than to survive and cave in to others. i tell my boss the absolute truth and opinions, if he doesnt like them he can fire me, others would be scared of saying the stuff i have said to him. but i have sorta a impulsivity or something that makes me not care about survival sometimes so i can blurt things out and get real fiery, then i have a time when i think and have sense and be like.... bruh, if you lose this job you never get one again as it was pure luck getting a job in the first place, which then makes me stressed i guess but i still spartan up and stick to my ideals and views. im transparent honest and blunt and view everyone as a equal human, so yeah this causes issues with authority figures that think their authority makes them count as more than a single human or above any other human.

I would be happy with a middle ground personally. Yes I’m struggling to keep up with all the NT’s in the world and it costs me  dearly. That said I have no one around me I can really relate to other than my 8yr old son. He doesn’t know he’s autistic and doesn’t know that I’m very possibly autistic. I’m surrounded by people I don’t really understand. I think it would take a massive amount of bravery to be able to say exactly what you want to say to someone. I’m hoping someday I can get to that point but for now I have no real option but to just continue with fitting in. Sad but true