Published on 12, July, 2020
As an older person with Autism, I was brought up in very different times with different thinking, values, acceptance, behaviour, etc (1970's & 80's).
The World has changed so much since then - both for better and worse.There have been so many advancements - particularly in science and this has benefitted us ASD'ers immensely.
One thing that is troubling me is that I hold a lot of "principles" that in this day and age would be considered "Old Fashioned", "Traditional", maybe even "Bigotry" or worse.There are things that I struggle to understand or accept which are based on my traditional attitude. I was brought up in an era when....
I openly discuss or rant about these topics along with some others that may be considered taboo with closed friends and family who have all become somewhat numb to my outrageousness / inappropriateness.
I have however managed to "behave" in public (stayed on the right side of the law), but occasionally do mutter things with a level of cowardice.My concern is that now that I am officially autistic, the shackles of having to mask may have been broken and that has the potential of me saying the wrong thing at the wrong time.
I'm marginally younger than you, 80/90's kid and only figured out recently that I'm non binary and asexual.
For years I simply couldn't get my head around the concept of non-binary and never heard of asexual. I knew I wasn't straight so assumed I must be gay had a couple of relationships so I was around the LGBTQ+ community most of the time.
Not wanting to upset others I took it upon myself to research about gender and sexuality. I read articles by people from the trans community, I listened at prides and finally things started to fit into place in my mind. Once I understood the subject more my mindset changed. These were ways to describe how I felt too, but bigotry and misinformation in my youth made me prejudiced and blinded. (Thank you Catholic school).
I wish I had advice on the released shackles. Since diagnosis I've found it increasingly difficult to play nice just for the neurotypicals. I'm hoping that will calm down when I stop being so angry that I wasn't diagnosed until now and start understanding my own needs so I can articulate myself better.
Thank you Max has left the platform (them/they) - your post seems the only one so far from "the other side of the fence" that actually read and understood my OP.
Thank you for talking about your bigotry and misinformation which lead to prejudice. That's probably where I have been and remain to be. Your beliefs obviously changed when you invested time and energy into the subject - something that sounds like it was driven by your curiosity about your own identity and sexuality.
For me, I do not have such an inspiration or reason to recalibrate. I have much bigger battles to fight - autism being just one component of what one of my neurologists sees as a very complex multi facetted case.
Not once (unless I can be corrected) have I criticised or said anything along the lines that people of other "persuasions" should be persecuted or victimised. What I have said though is that such things weren't as prevalent in the era of my upbringing. And that is something that has influenced me and I cannot deny that they were there.
Regarding the "released shackles" (the main point of my OP) is that it scares me what that may look like. More so, will any of my past experiences be blurted out [unintentionally] at the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm not saying that there is a right place and time for that, but I do have loved ones near and dear to me that understand me. Since my diagnosis I have changed, those shackles have come off and that has already resulted in considerable changes. Things such as significant increase in my stimming both at home and out.
When everything started kicking off on this thread earlier, I took myself away to Aldi to get some bits. The people in the shop must have thought I was a right weirdo - I was in overdrive with my stimming and it wasn't confined to just my hands.
That's one thing you can let your catholic school off the hook for. It was literally illegal to "promote" anything along those lines. I had a similar experience where it took years of thinking I was straight going through a phase or gay and in denial because to even mention gay people in education would have been bad enough, let alone telling children that there are some people attracted to more than 1 gender.