Published on 12, July, 2020
Me -yep, plenty.
Music is one of the few things that keeps me alive. I sometimes contemplate the concerts I got dragged to by my partner at the time, as a youngster in the 80s.
I was there but not there, if you get me. While the thousands in the crowd at Manchester Apollo jumped out of their seats, punching the air, making devil horns, playing air-guitars and head-banging - I stood there like a block of wood feeling super mega uncomfortable and bewildered. I would always white out and can't remember a single thing from any of those gigs. All I also remember from Donington back then were the awful horrendous toilets and the panic about getting back through a ginormous sea of tens of thousands of people to get back to my partner! Why didn't I take photos? Keep souvenirs? - I have no idea, other than that I was there, but not there.
I came across some photos online a few months back that someone had uploaded from Donington at that time and weirdly (in a where's waldo moment), I was able to pick us out in the ginormous crowd of teeny tiny people!! And yet, I remember almost nothing about it!
Pity I can't go back though with the knowledge I have now!
Yep. I regret:
Just a few. Sorry it's so bleak!
Not really that bleak don't worry. Sounds like something you've definitely ruminated on. And most of them seem to involve other people... I know where you're coming from, being intense can be difficult for others to handle.
I didn't get braces either, too scared of the dentist! Wanna join the Wonky Smile Club?
Is it the things that you did, and wish you hadn't? Or the things you didn't do and wish you had that's the worst? or both....??
Sadly I don't think people are that forgiving.
I felt that way too. I wouldn't really understand why things faded (or flat out ended) when it seemed we were so close at one point but I wish I had ways of dealing with that better.
Especially as in a lot of those cases, that was not the only person in my life.
I dunno, I mean if you don't know, you just don't, you're in the dark at that time, right? Not so much an excuse, more just a fact.
I think from my own perspective, I always expected friendships and relationships to last forever, I mean, like for life, you've got this friend like 'that's it now' cast in stone - forever, life, no matter what, you know what I'm saying? When they didn't it came as a huge bewildering shock. And with relationships it can be a really bad thing, as you take all sorts of cr*p and can't end it, cos it's for life and can't be changed...yikes
Darn it, I'm all alone then in the Wonky Smile Club......
Yeah I came on too strong and I wish I didn't, but at the same time I just didn't know. However, I think I'm expected to have known and not knowing is hardly a good excuse for having hurt someone.
I'm getting braces now so at least that'll be ticked off.
It's mostly the former. I've edited it just to make things clear - the last point is something I did do and wish I hadn't. The others are things I didn't do.