Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello!
I'm a 39 year old lady that has been "quirky" her whole life. My sister was almost convinced something was wrong with me from a MH POV. For the past 10 odd years I've tried to figure out what's "wrong* with me. A GP once suggested OCD traits, and Ive been to therapy for many years but she always end up blaming everything to one traumatic event, even though my quirks were clear many years before that.
The more I think about it, the more I'm certain I fall somewhere along the spectrum. I've done the Aspie and the AQ 10 tests, both showing that my suspicions are sustained.
Here's the kicker... I have a fairly normal life and don't really struggle. Yes, I only have one friend, but like many of you only like the idea of friendships but not necessarily having one (or the effort). I have a client facing job and I think I do ok (it doesn't mean I like it though). I do have a loving husband, and two children (I'm way more attached to one) and my dog who I love. I have no extended family and I don't talk (nor have no real desire or need ) to my sister. In fact I've never felt ANY attachment towards her EVER like at all.
So would it be worth it? At this point is more about vindication and self understanding. Hopefully having therapy who can guide me and be able to discern between trauma and spectrum related traits.
What do you think?
Hi :) A diagnosis can be helpful if you think you could benefit from reasonable adjustments at work. It can also help you better understand yourself but for this you do not necessarily need a formal diagnosis. Some people need that external validation. I am glad I got a diagnosis as it helped me understand myself better (and as I keep questioning everything, getting a formal diagnosis somewhat helped though that doesn't really silence all doubts and imposter syndrome feelings). In addition, I thought in case I needed reasonable adjustments during my PhD or later at work it would be good to have it formalised. I am now actually getting some support at university as I am autistic. I had also accumulated a lot of other diagnoses which didn't really fit but some of them were quite damaging (I got diagnosed with an eating disorder which I did not have... I do struggle with IBS and food but it is very much autism related and I was getting very damaging advice which did not apply to me.). Once I got the autism diagnosis I had a reassessment and they agreed I had been misdiagnosed and it has been changed on my record. There is sadly a lot of stigma if you have a diagnosis of anorexia nervosa, so I was glad that they removed that. So for me a formal diagnosis had advantages.
When I was diagnosed, mum and I actually realised that she is most likely also autistic. However she is not interested at all in seeking a diagnosis, as she is very at peace with who she is and has no need for adjustments at work (finally found a job she is happy with :)).
So it really depends on what you want and need :)