Published on 12, July, 2020
This is quite embarrassing to write but I'm going to do it anyway. Okay - this might just be a 'me' thing - if that's the case please just ignore this post but:
Why is getting washed and/or clean so hard?
I don't know if it is an autistic thing but getting in the shower/changing clothes/changing bedding and doing laundry is so hard for me. I am an independent adult I should be able to function better. :(
I just had a shower and washed my hair for the first time in X weeks (too ashamed to say). I feel better now and I smell nice, so why don't I manage to do it more often?
I live alone and rarely go out or see people, so my lack of washing isn't bothering anyone. I wanted to ask my weekly cleaner to help me change my sheets but I am too ashamed for her to see the state of my bed so its something I will have to tackle alone.
Anyway, if anyone can relate please comment below, or if you just want to tell me I'm being a big baby that's also fine.
I can relate, and my youngest adult son much more so. I just slightly dislike this stuff, but my son really hates it. I think if he didn’t still live with us I doubt he’d have a shower for about 3 months. He just hates it so much. I have to encourage him so much to clean his teeth - I remind him him about ten times throughout the day to encourage him. I understand why he hates it because I really don’t like it much either - but I feel better after a shower etc, but he doesn’t feel better after a shower so doesn’t have that motivation. So it’s just a matter of lots of gentle encouragement in our house! But I really do worry about what will happen when we’re not here to encourage him a bit. Hopefully he will find the discipline to encourage himself by that point.
Hi Kate. Wow you are such an understanding and supportive parent it's lovely to read. Your son is so lucky to have you looking out for him. I'm much like you and your son. I really can't tolerate washing, the feel of water or a flannel on my skin is horrible and usually sends me in to a frenzy and meltdown. My mum was like you, she used to support me and help me but after she died I just stopped. I'm ashamed of that really but I never thought of it. Now I've got nursing staff who are very supportive as well and help me with this.
I hope your son can learn to manage in the end. Maybe reminders in his phone might help? But for now keep encouraging him gently that will be helping a lot already.