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Feedback for managers and mods

Deleted user
over 1 year ago

Hello,

I'm an autistic woman 30 years old who has been in the forum for few months now. I don't want to complain about certain members. I want to complain about how the forum is managed. Is anyone here reading the comments written in this forum?!. Is anyone there watching the attitude of the members?!. It's a dangerous place here, maybe similarly to the world we live in but unfortunately with a description that makes us feel like we will be safe and accepted while we really don't.
I have, on top of my autism, suffered dealing with sexism, racism and the homophobia of the world all my life. The forum isn't an exception. Unfortunately, the loud voices are the ugly ones. People who managed to push everyone away from their private lives are doing the same pushing people away from the forum. Did anyone of you read comments like "feminists want to dictate the world?". "What's the worth of your life at this point?". "I can find your real name and all about you now". "Why don't you medicat your depressed wife so she'd give you sexual consent". "Back in my days people were only men and women and nothing else, I don't understand this modern gender concepts". "A person cannot suddenly decide to become asexual, that's abuse to their partner". "Gender roles were good in the past and still are". "Why do we host more people in our country while we have our problems to deal with"... Countless amount of such speech is present in your forum written by different people in different discussions. Do you even read this??. I understand that you can't pick who has access to the forum and who doesn't, but if you heard a random person talking like this would you feel safe?. I don't. I don't feel safe in this forum and I blame you for it. I have found a community that helped me a lot when it comes to my autism management but damaged me a lot when it comes to many other struggles in my life. I'm leaving and I don't really care about what you do next, but if you care about feedback at all, this is mine.
I'm sorry for bringing this up again. I simply can't accept it.
Parents
  • over 1 year ago
    I don't feel safe in this forum and I blame you for it.

    I understand where you are coming from, but I feel it unfair to blame the mods as it isn't their job to protect you from anything you find offensive.

    If we had one person who found discussion about cuddly toys offensive and another group loved talking about the toys, should we block the group who talk about the toys?

    An extreme example but it illustrates the point.

    Yes we should keep a lid on legally defined hate speech or anything that explicitly breaches the Ts & Cs of the site, but this is a fine line sometimes as the hate speech is often only implied.

    I think we should take some personal responsibility and avoid discussions that begin to trigger us or we find offensive.

Reply
  • over 1 year ago
    I don't feel safe in this forum and I blame you for it.

    I understand where you are coming from, but I feel it unfair to blame the mods as it isn't their job to protect you from anything you find offensive.

    If we had one person who found discussion about cuddly toys offensive and another group loved talking about the toys, should we block the group who talk about the toys?

    An extreme example but it illustrates the point.

    Yes we should keep a lid on legally defined hate speech or anything that explicitly breaches the Ts & Cs of the site, but this is a fine line sometimes as the hate speech is often only implied.

    I think we should take some personal responsibility and avoid discussions that begin to trigger us or we find offensive.

Children