Published on 12, July, 2020
because of the arguments, why not hibernate?
I have done this before.
You can change your name to 'hibernating'.
It's good psychologically because it stops me from posting and indicates to others that you are having a break.
Also, you can choose to still PM (which I do) which isolates you less.
Roy has chosen to do this yesterday.
I've been told by one person that someone they knew was thinking of joining but didn't because of the disagreements, others post far less, others join and then stay a short while.
I was sad to read Billy87 s post today.
To the new people here: it's not always like this and only certain subjects are incendiary so if you can manage to avoid reading them, that would help.
I am guilty of having joined into arguments because I also feel passionately about certain subjects and I expect I will occasionally still make my point.
However, I think restraint here is the key and personal insults should never be acceptable.
I dearly hope that this thread doesn't go the same way as my 'arguments' thread and become one almightly row ...
Another thing I've been pondering on.
I used to be on a stock photography forum and that decended into rows too.
In that instance, it was because of large egos quite often.
Here, it's very different.
We have a set of people who all have vulnerabilities and quite often, have suffered at the hands of others.
Therefore, when subjects come up such as *ex and gender/gender roles, these can be triggers and can end up in conflict and I think can be quite harmful to the people involved.
We all have very different experiences of life, are different in many different ways, but perhaps rather than going the way of the outside world's wars, we can try to learn to get along, in spite of these differences.
I am also on other forums and it often also falls into having a row there too, and I honestly think this is the usual whenever any non-apathetic folks meet online but the flavour/type of row speaks volumes between them. On the other forums it rarely goes above the level of "does pineapple belong on pizza" for example, rarely do the disagreements cause active harm to the members on those other sites.
That's true. But part of that is accepting that people can say things that you hate, that make your blood boil, and that you're going to respond to the point, and the arguments, but not attack the person. It's accepting that you can contradict opinions you don't like but you can't silence them or vilanize people for having them.