Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I have been thinking a lot about my diagnosis which was given in 2022 as ASC / ADHD and c-PTSD. I was fascinated to read that psychologists used to believe Autism was caused by traumatic events because there are so many similar features eg the need for control, routines,sensory issues.
Apparently this is no longer the general consensus, and is now considered to be a neurological development issue - but i can also see why clinicians came to this conclusion previously.
The OT that i spent time with ( she is a very nice lady) told me that with Autism, it is present in childhood, i did have some traumatic childhood experiences but i have always been hyper-sensitive, anyway what i do know is that depression and anxiety are common in autism, and apparently caused by the fact autistic people are acutely aware that they are different and do not ' fit in ' i certainly agree with that.
I am also told that a person with Autism and ADHD looks different to a person with Autism because ADHD element can give the impression the person is more 'sociable' or ' approachable' having said that, i am told that Autistic people observe others and watch their behaviours and mimic them in order to try to fit in somehow. I think this is true for myself, although in the last 10 years i have given up ' trying to fit in '
One last point on trauma ; i have recently undertaken EMDR therapy which really seems to have improved the symptoms ( less flashbacks)
What are your thoughts?
I know that I have both :/
I also have both. Have worked through a lot after a bereavement in 2017 set me into a breakdown that nearly led to me taking my own life. Closest I've ever come on two occasions.
Bullying was an issue, before that I was traumatized in front of other children because of a teacher. I was also physically assaulted by a teacher who slammed me against some lockers by my neck with another child at age 10, he was sacked for it. I was physically hurt on a couple of occasions by other students, bloody noses and the like, which I have always struggled to accept.
Friendships I've made through life I've let go because I'm unsure of people's intentions, so is a protection mechanism that ultimately only serves to increase my isolation.
These days I'm doing better after working through a lot of it. Since diagnosis 3 years ago, I now let my interests lead me much more - I've stopped fighting against who I am (masking) and been able to start accepting myself. I'm lucky that my partner has stuck with me on this and is supportive of my neurodiversity. Turns out her best mate is also autistic, so it seems she is a NT with a good character that integrates well with ND. I'm so lucky I realise.
My own family, is a different story, are very distant and barely seem to bother with me anymore. I think both my parents are ND. One with autism the other with ADHD. Neither know it. I've only told them about the ADHD part of my diagnosis as I don't want to trigger issues in them (they are 70 + 75 now) so I figured what's the point?
My brother emigrated to Australia (I'm in UK) and clearly seems happier being away on his own - definitely some ND there, but he won't entertain the idea. He instead lives in a world of self-help guides and seems ok with that. He is able to socialise better than me so isn't too big an issue.
My biggest issue atm is developibg my career (social settings pose a big problem for me), IBD and migraines. Light sensitivity triggers the worst eye pain and puts my in bed for hours at a time