Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone,
TL;DR: I'm looking for advice on dealing with my mood swings and outbursts of anger.
I'm hoping for a bit of advice. I've had mood swings a lot throughout my life. I'm not sure if they are tied to my autism or not, but today I had a massive mood swing going from happy to angry and ended up snapping at my wife which, understandably, really upset her. It's been a very long time since I've done this, but several years ago, during a time which I now recognise as me being in burnout and struggling a lot, I had a lot of moments like this.
I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to manage these things. For context, I was trying to make hot chocolate for the family using a velvetiser thing from hotel Chocolat (as a side note I highly recommend these). They use flakes of grated chocolate, but a few weeks ago they were left on top of the air fryer and several of the sachets melted and clumped up. I tried breaking this up before use but some got stuck in the machine which causes the motor to make a horrible sound which makes me freak out because I feel like it's going to break the machine. I got distressed by this, but my wife just said it's fine and to keep it going but I ended up snapping at her and I upset her.
I fully appreciate that I am in the wrong here, but I would appreciate if anyone can suggest anything to help with managing situations like this where things are rapidly going wrong without me getting angry.
Thanks,
Phil
I have to write down all accidents , anger after they happened and think in my mind what wad a trigger before it happened. Most times i have to stop what i m doing and remove myself in calm space to sit and calm down . If it happenes to my LO - i have to stay still and waite untill he will calm down and again think what was a trigger. By practising like that - you will manage to see those triggers coming in time . Best to stop doing anything and remove yourself from situation. My favourite stimming is - music , walking , fresh air - breathing , or i count in my mind till 100 in 5 . Works everytime for me. You need to find what stim will work just for you. . I found it getting more hard for me when my brain sensory overloaded. So noises, lights , sounds - really bangs my brain very quick and i can get easily frustrated from sound of people voices for example. It clashes very much with Sensory processing difficulties my 6 y o LO has and his spectrum as we r opposite sometimes. E.g. he is loud and likes to touch everything. I hate sounds around me and cannt stand when someone touches me.
You probably had panic attack / anxiety that machine would brake ( brain didnt recognise and didnt read what is going to happened , so you have panicked. Then noise of machine - got on top as sensory processing overload . So it banged for you to do stimming the away of turning it against your partner as she was there .
Hope that helps.