Autistic Sex Reputation (NSFW)

I’ve never heard that be something that NT say. I have heard some autistic people, and I believe there maybe some credence to this, suggest that autistic people may be more kinky on average. This kind of makes sense because if you’re autistic arguably you’re less susceptible to being affected by social taboos which are of course what most kinks go against.

i’ve also heard it said that some autistic women might be having a lot more casual sex than their non-autistic peers. Not because autistic women are more or less interested in casual sex but because they may be less affected by concerns that their social standing and a reputation might be reduced by engaging in it.

but then I’ve equally heard it said that autistic people are more likely to be manipulated for sexual purposes particularly autistic women and that because of those bad experiences statistically they’re more likely to be disinterested in sex altogether.

As I’ve said before I think autistic people tend to gravitate towards extremes. In part because we’ve had extreme life experiences compared to Neurotypicals. people who are extremely sex adverse probably aren’t very notable or obvious amoung The general population. people who are extremely prone to sexual activity and casual sex are probably a bit more obvious and kind of hit the confirmation bias more.

i’ve often heard it suggesting that autistic men are a good deal more sexual than they’re non-autistic peers. but again I think this is likely to be them being less subtle about concealing their sexual intentions and also more open about their sexual interests than there autistic peers.

in my general experience Neurotypicals almost never view any variation of autistic sexuality with any kind of positive light.

I’ve never heard that be something that NT say. I have heard some autistic people, and I believe there maybe some credence to this, suggest that autistic people may be more kinky on average. This kind of makes sense because if you’re autistic arguably you’re less susceptible to being affected by social taboos which are of course what most kinks go against.

i’ve also heard it said that some autistic women might be having a lot more casual sex than their non-autistic peers. Not because autistic women are more or less interested in casual sex but because they may be less affected by concerns that their social standing and a reputation might be reduced by engaging in it.

but then I’ve equally heard it said that autistic people are more likely to be manipulated for sexual purposes particularly autistic women and that because of those bad experiences statistically they’re more likely to be disinterested in sex altogether.

As I’ve said before I think autistic people tend to gravitate towards extremes. In part because we’ve had extreme life experiences compared to Neurotypicals. people who are extremely sex adverse probably aren’t very notable or obvious amoung The general population. people who are extremely prone to sexual activity and casual sex are probably a bit more obvious and kind of hit the confirmation bias more.

i’ve often heard it suggesting that autistic men are a good deal more sexual than they’re non-autistic peers. but again I think this is likely to be them being less subtle about concealing their sexual intentions and also more open about their sexual interests than there autistic peers.

in my general experience Neurotypicals almost never view any variation of autistic sexuality with any kind of positive light.

You know I think it’s important to set straight that  the manipulation of autistic people into sexual situations is not just a question of lies of love. people saying ‘oh but I love you so you must do this for me’ or ‘if you really loved me you would do this for me’ or ‘everybody else is doing it.’ yes that sort of manipulation does happen but there is another very important form of manipulation that can take place.

that’s manipulation in the form of simple aggressive bullying. Autistic people from a very young age are often getting into conflict unintentionally and adults around them typically blame them for this. There is a tendency to internalise that blame to believe that all conflict that occurs is their fault and if they don’t avoid conflict they are bad people. Parents foolishly say things like well if you just ignore them they’ll stop bullying you which of course ignore the fact but many bullies do not merely bully to amuse themselves they bully because they want something; lunch money or some other thing.

unfortunately it’s the same with sex. these autistic people can grow up to be just afraid to assert them selves, to say no and unfortunately that Marks some out as targets for bullying and also for sexual bullying where bullies will attempt to get them to agree to sexual things to give them sexual favours because they know they are adverse to conflict and that they are afraid to say no.

and this can trigger a vicious cycle because furthermore they are bullied for more they are afraid to say no more passive they become which marks them out more clearly as targets for exactly the sort of treatment that they are hoping to avoid.

It starts off subtly with so-called soft no’s and soon they just don’t even say no soon they even say yes until people who aren’t even bullying them they say yes to not because they’re being bullied but because they’re now so conditioned to fear any level of assertiveness but saying no it’s just too difficult for them

it starts off subtly with so-called soft ‘no’s’ and soon they just don’t even say no, soon they even say yes; until people who aren’t even bullying them they say yes to not because they want to but  they’re now so conditioned to fear any level of assertiveness or directness that saying no it’s just too difficult for them.

And I’m not suggesting for a moment that individuals who have had this experience are in any way to blame. I am however saying that this is a very good reason why it’s important from a very early age to teach autistic children that conflict is okay and that there are situations in which aggression is appropriate. I think for autistic people more than most people ‘no’ has to mean no and ‘no’ has to be said when you mean no. I think that’s one of the few ways for us to be clear navigating these sorts of situations. We need to teach our children hard direct nos as the norm.

This was enlightening. Thank you very much.