Published on 12, July, 2020
I've been alone for the past week. I had only one human contact which was a video call with a friend. Otherwise, totally alone. Since I'm going to therapy today, that will change. It scares me to realise that I can happily and calmly skip human contact for long time. What was the longest time that you have spent by yourself?
Life hasn’t generally let me get beyond three or four days without at least some slight human interaction, even if that’s being asked for payment in a shop. More typically it will be the requirement to go to work, or a crossing paths with a family member. I think I probably have made it to a full week when ill back when I was living further from people who might stop by to check on me.
I’ve often said that I could contentedly go for many days without seeing or talking to another human being. The life of a Trappist monk! Now I’m not so sure - my anxiety has reached a height where talking can help a good deal to take the edge off, even if that’s phoning the Samaritans as on one occasion (so far).
The lines are more blurred now of course. When we might send a brief text or three in a day, or communicate on here, is that part of a viable period of solitude? Or would it be no communication at all. If the latter, then my solo trips to my parents’ holiday house in Donegal probably have been the longest periods of zero contact of any kind, and just sitting to enjoy the silence or choosing early evening for a walk along deserted coastline in the fading light.