What defines your autism?

"What defines my autism?"

My inability to recognise irony --- a large part of British humour, my inability to take myself and life itself less seriously.  My inability to decode and respond to interactive signals. I struggle with empathy yet "ironically" am tuned into the wants and needs of my dog and with animals in general. I put that down to having developed my own people auto-filter if I detect rejection of any sort. (Very self-defeating)

Good morning chap.  I do consider my ability to communicate with animals one of my super powers.  I much prefer the company of a dog to that of a human.  I prefer to meet a random horse or cow on a walk rather than a fellow human because I can understand the former species (and vise versa) more reliably and with greater reciprocal benefit in 9/10 cases.

Unlike you, irony poses no challenge to me......but decoding and APPROPRIATELY responding to interactive signals is, and always has been, a fraught issue for me.  I struggle with the fact that honesty and directness is invariably frowned up.

Perhaps I should move to the Big Apple (and yes, I'm being ironic!)

NAS81486,

I value honesty when it's tactful but can be very hurtful when it's done without thinking about how it could make the receiver feel......  :-) Honesty is very important to me as I can't stand lying or bitchiness.  I think if you don't like someone, it's best to avoid them or not speak very much to them until they get the idea.  There's nothing worse than people being nice to your face then bad mouthing you behind your back.  I don't understand why people do this.  What's your take on bitchiness/lying?  Sometimes I don't tell someone something if I think it will hurt their feelings but if they ask me directly, I'll prepare them by saying "you might not like what I have to say..."

NAS81486,

I value honesty when it's tactful but can be very hurtful when it's done without thinking about how it could make the receiver feel......  :-) Honesty is very important to me as I can't stand lying or bitchiness.  I think if you don't like someone, it's best to avoid them or not speak very much to them until they get the idea.  There's nothing worse than people being nice to your face then bad mouthing you behind your back.  I don't understand why people do this.  What's your take on bitchiness/lying?  Sometimes I don't tell someone something if I think it will hurt their feelings but if they ask me directly, I'll prepare them by saying "you might not like what I have to say..."

I value honesty when it's tactful but can be very hurtful when it's done without thinking about how it could make the receiver feel.

Oh course, everyone should be as kind and caring as possible when communicating with each other. The "go-to" reaction to 'honesty' seems to be a presumption that it is akin to 'cruelty.'  This is not how my head is wired.  I actively seek out honest straightforward advice and feedback from people regarding everything and anything, including their perception of me and my actions - good or bad or offensive, I don't mind - but I do CRAVE honesty.  I think I'm going a bit Billy Joel now?!

My "go-to" reaction to 'bitchiness/lying' is a presumption of 'cruelty' and/or social insecurity.  I don't like the duplicity.