What defines your autism?

I tend hyper-focus on things that drawn my attention, so in the short-term I can really add-some-meat to a mission of interest, which is a good thing until I need to stop-something or start-something or switch-to-something..

As a positive I guess I can say that I only ever seek genuine interaction with others, but that’s a double-edged sword, because the world tends to revolve-around seeking to play-the-game..

What defines my autism? 

Obvious things like social difficulties, intense interests and repetitive behaviour.

I am new to this and am still thinking about what else may define my autism. I feel that I can communicate with animals and they do seem to like me so maybe it's true, I don't see why not. It's hard to explain to people who can't do it, they just think you're a bit odd! I am not religious but think that all living things have a soul, or being - not sure what to call it - and that ultimately we're all made from the same stuff so perhaps we should be able to communicate with each other! 

A bit sidetracked there. I like animals and nature, I feel part of the living world far more than society and actually that's ok. I like my analytical brain and intense focus most of the time, it allows me to see and learn things that others miss. Sometimes analyzing everything constantly can be exhausting and I wish I could switch it off! 

I can't believe that you STILL can't post!  NOT cool.

......but wait, you HAVE just posted?!  Mental overload.

Bump

I can mimic people with ease like copy their voice or how they walk.

I can learn things really fast, like my brain just knows what to do. I pick it up quickly.

Though I can't often relate to people I understand when they need a listening ear and support them.

I'm honest, sometimes to a fault.

Check - Yes

Check - Yes

Nope - Polar opposite here.

Check - Yes.

Welcome Identity.  I am Number.

Positives:

I can mimic people with ease like copy their voice or how they walk.

I can learn things really fast, like my brain just knows what to do. I pick it up quickly.

Though I can't often relate to people I understand when they need a listening ear and support them.

I'm honest, sometimes to a fault.

Negatives;

Anxiety.

Lack in social skill and understanding.

Can't process some things.

And the rest of the usual.

Always a consideration, granted.

I still head for the social interaction with another human, over being told what to do in exacting and excruciating (to me) detail by a machine programmed by a human.

When I did get proper "germophobic" in early 2020 I invested in a UV-C bulb to replace our hallway lamp, precisely to combat the problem you describe. Also to irradiate incoming parcels and post etc. I've no idea if it was effective, (although there is plenty of data to say that it is) but it sure made me feel a bit safer and consequently less afraid to do a lot of normal stuff during COVID. 

Even when I shop I avoid the manned tills and use the self service checkouts.

It's not because I don't want the social interaction with the cashier.  I just don't want their dirty/deseased hands and fingers all over my groceries.

Yeah but you can still have periods of solitude without it affecting the ability to function in society. That's what "me time" is for.
Also I am self sufficient I used to live on crofter land before I got swept up into this suburb.

They have to.

Unless you are a gloriously self sufficient individual able to take care of all your own needs then you have to interact with others in order to live.

That "lovely solitude" comes with a price...

Robert124 said:

I can go days and weeks without speaking with another person.

I do too.

Tho in my case I don't think I can call it exclusion if I'm doing it willingly, really I just prefer it that way. The bad thing is in recent years people don't let me escape to do it so much, family and work kind of get in the way of my lovely solitude lately.

Writing on here is different from speaking with people face to face - for me too.

I, too, am quite good with non verbal and unorthodox communication.

I always communicate with animals (all and any) in preference to humans.

Emails and written form can be tricky for me.  I have the capability to convey the same message in a multiplicity of different ways.......I can obsess about the best way.....write way too much......in my attempts to keep it simple for the reader....I can confuse the reader to distraction.

Face to face can be tricky for me too.  I have the capability to convey the same message in a multiplicity of different ways.......I can obsess about the best way.....talk way too much......in my attempts to find the best "tuning" with the person I am speaking with....I can confuse (and scare) the listener to distraction because I will "flip" from one mask to the other with a degree of precision and competency that causes alarm.

People seem to spend their time concentrating on me and "what the hell I am" rather than the message I am trying to convey in the conversation we are trying to conduct.  I have been shunned and banished from many "groups" on the basis that I cannot be categorised and therefore cannot be trusted.  I am unable to "assign" normal social hierarchical status on people whom I meet - I quite literally "take as I find."  I have been told that I am frighteningly intense, frighteningly confident (which is true at the surface I suppose) and confusingly varied in my presentation.

I like it on here Robert.....with folk like you......we are far more alike than you might imagine.

Number.

Writing on here is different from speaking with people face to face.

I am quite good with non verbal and unorthodox communication.  I can communicate with animals (cats).  Also emails, web chats, texts hold no fear for me.  But talking to actual people I mumble, avoid eye contact, I freeze, say the wrong things, I have a monotone voice. 

Well, that will not be the case for you on here, while I'm around......if you don't find me too odious?

I am quite social - and I don't want you to feel excluded - you are a big chunk of this place Robert - you have contributed a lot to this place - I prefer to see you around here.

Do you think that writing on here is the same as speaking with another person?

Social exclusion.  

I can go days and weeks without speaking with another person.

I am willing to stand out like a nail and be knocked down for it.

Love it

I thought it might be fun to bring one or two of my old threads back up.

There seem to have been quite a few new members of the forum in recent weeks, so they may like to read or even post on them.

Time will tell.