Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello fellow autistic people.
I just wanted to see what other people’s experiences of disclosing were like. I have recently started telling people I am autistic and I don’t really know how to explain it because I either assume other people know what being autistic means (they don’t) or I think about explaining in too much depth for a particular situation. How do you explain your autistic needs and experience?
Thanks in advance.
If there is a point in a conversation that makes sense, I say something as simple as “I’m starting to talk about it a lot more now, but I’m autistic and was diagnosed fairly recently.”
The trick is stopping there as far as I’m concerned. I spent ages explaining what autism was and how it impacts my life to the first few people. It was a case of massively over sharing. I now say something like what I detailed above and just stop. If they want to know more, they will ask. It feels strange if they don’t ask, but at least that way I know I’m not chucking information at them that I’ll later look back on and regret.
When I overshare, I tend to remember at night when I’m trying to sleep and I start to feel embarrassed. This strategy avoids that.
Thanks for your reply.
Oakling said:The trick is stopping there as far as I’m concerned. I spent ages explaining what autism was and how it impacts my life to the first few people. It was a case of massively over sharing. I now say something like what I detailed above and just stop. If they want to know more, they will ask. It feels strange if they don’t ask, but at least that way I know I’m not chucking information at them that I’ll later look back on and regret.
Thanks, this is helpful. I could spend ages explaining being autistic too but I don’t know if it will mean much to the people I disclose to. I understand what you mean about over sharing, people may think you are giving lots of personal information when actually it is just your experience and therefore relevant to everything you do.
Maybe I should just wait for specific questions like you say and then explain my autistic needs.
Oakling said:It feels strange if they don’t ask, but at least that way I know I’m not chucking information at them that I’ll later look back on and regret
Yes at least this way, you will only provide more information about being autistic to the people who want to know more and understand your autistic self.