Published on 12, July, 2020
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I can't work due to my autism, I find work to stressful etc.
But I hate the stigma attached to not working, and people like neighbours and family etc etc get curious and will be like "and what do you do?" "what do you work as ?" etc
I keep my autism secret from the family apart from my mum.
I used to be truthful to people and say I did not work, but they get pretty cruel.
I like to go in and out of my home (that is before the pandemic as I am vulnerable to covid) and go sit in a cafe for a coffee, it is my happy time, but even then I found that when I went to the same cafe all the time, they started saying "that you away to work?" I ended up changing cafes, and bringing a laptop to pretend i was doing something.
same with any groups of friends well not really friends but you know meetups were you might have a hobby like art or something and you meetup and do art in a community hall or cafe. Then they will ask me "what do you do".
I don't want to say well I cant work due to the type of autism I have.
I dont want to say I dont work
I wonder if anyone on here gets the same thing? and what do you say to them?
I do study sometimes via online courses (I work those around my pain days) but I cant say I am a student forever or they will be like tweaking that something is not right.
I dont go out just now, before covid I usually go out on my own to a cafe, but sometimes i be brave and do a little outside hobby or crafting thing , and right now I am between friends, but not sure what to do when i make friends.
all people my age are thinking of settling down and being all grown up. And I am still living my life like I am 19. it is hard to find anyone my age that has not really grown up in the way we are expected to
Hope this post makes sense?
You are not alone. Same for my son. All i can say is what I say to him which is first start by doing something that will help you feel better and the rest of the world can go fu*& itself. The trouble with trying to fit into a neuro typical world is that although you can learn knew ways to do that it will be a mask and I know that my son has explained to me how his brain wants him not to go out and do neuro typical things but at the same time he is a human being and needs these interactions so it is very difficult. The pandemic has just made things much harder on those with autism for sure. So its different for everyone and you have to weigh up on ballance if doing neuro typical things is helping you or if it is just helping other people. I as I say to my son is first help yourself and for him that is dealing with first how to help himself with his anxiety etc etc etc before he even attempts getting out the front door. Do what is feeling right for you which will give you good quality of life find things to do (if you cannot go out) like hobbies/interests in activities you find bring you joy to bring you a level of satisfaction and structure ie learning something that you can do and be proud of etc.Thats all I can say from what I have learned hoped it helped. Try to keep and eye on yourself that you do not fall into depression as that can take the joy out of activities and those activities and that joy is vital and so very important.