Eating out

Hi, just wondering if anyone else finds eating out in restaurants hell, I have  always struggled with menus and finding something that I can tolerate,  but it was only six months ago that I realised that I’m autistic. Looking through a menu fills me with anxiety, will there be anything I can eat? My wife has had a lot to deal with over the last 35 years, the last six months I’ve started telling her what affects me, some of my dislikes and things that cause me sensory overload. One of these things is food that  is out of my safe group. We did a recent trip to Milan, ended up in KFC and McDonald’s 3 times as I just needed to eat.

I see a lot of posts on here from partners of autistic people asking for help with trying to work out their partners. I’m trying to show how hard it is from the other side, Being told that your being awkward and making everything about you isn’t helpful.  A trip to Spain recently led to a big meltdown in the hotel’s main restaurant. I just couldn’t find a food that I could eat and then the noise of people all talking at once finished with me crashing. We went to a local gastro pub last night and it was a fish night ( unknown to me), I started to shutdown and get told off for starting the silent treatment. Being asked if your okay is fine, after about 4 times it becomes patronising and if you say your not then you are ruining the night.  My wife to be honest has tried a lot to understand me, but sometimes I feel totally cutoff and have no one to talk to who actually understands, even most  professionals aren’t actually autistic.
Being told to try and be a bit more adventurous doesn’t help. sorry to rant on, just finding food and being understood hard at the moment, how do some of you cope in eateries?  on a brighter note, cheese sandwiches for lunch today!

Parents
  • I feel the same about eating out so I don't do it. If I absolutely had to have food while away from home and hadn't brought any with me I'd go to a supermarket and buy bread. The whole experience of eating out is unpleasant and overly difficult. Most places have shops that will sell you food where you (a) know what's in it and (b) can eat immediately, so I don't know why anyone would hang around waiting in a restaurant and pay a lot of money for something that's probably greasy, spicy, or just not what you were expecting. The only argument I can see for eating in a restaurant is if you want to be indoors for a while, eg if it's raining, and you have nowhere else to go.

Reply
  • I feel the same about eating out so I don't do it. If I absolutely had to have food while away from home and hadn't brought any with me I'd go to a supermarket and buy bread. The whole experience of eating out is unpleasant and overly difficult. Most places have shops that will sell you food where you (a) know what's in it and (b) can eat immediately, so I don't know why anyone would hang around waiting in a restaurant and pay a lot of money for something that's probably greasy, spicy, or just not what you were expecting. The only argument I can see for eating in a restaurant is if you want to be indoors for a while, eg if it's raining, and you have nowhere else to go.

Children
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