Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, just wondering if anyone else finds eating out in restaurants hell, I have always struggled with menus and finding something that I can tolerate, but it was only six months ago that I realised that I’m autistic. Looking through a menu fills me with anxiety, will there be anything I can eat? My wife has had a lot to deal with over the last 35 years, the last six months I’ve started telling her what affects me, some of my dislikes and things that cause me sensory overload. One of these things is food that is out of my safe group. We did a recent trip to Milan, ended up in KFC and McDonald’s 3 times as I just needed to eat.
I see a lot of posts on here from partners of autistic people asking for help with trying to work out their partners. I’m trying to show how hard it is from the other side, Being told that your being awkward and making everything about you isn’t helpful. A trip to Spain recently led to a big meltdown in the hotel’s main restaurant. I just couldn’t find a food that I could eat and then the noise of people all talking at once finished with me crashing. We went to a local gastro pub last night and it was a fish night ( unknown to me), I started to shutdown and get told off for starting the silent treatment. Being asked if your okay is fine, after about 4 times it becomes patronising and if you say your not then you are ruining the night. My wife to be honest has tried a lot to understand me, but sometimes I feel totally cutoff and have no one to talk to who actually understands, even most professionals aren’t actually autistic. Being told to try and be a bit more adventurous doesn’t help. sorry to rant on, just finding food and being understood hard at the moment, how do some of you cope in eateries? on a brighter note, cheese sandwiches for lunch today!
Hi, I don't have a solution to this but I just wanted to say that I can relate- I struggle a lot with eating and food and I have a tendency to eat the same thing over and over - I find eating out very stressful too and avoid it completely at the moment. In the past I would go to one or two restaurants where I was familiar with the menu and would always order the same thing more or less. Eating out can be so stressful so I have a lot of respect for anyone who faces that stress. I can also relate to the noise issue in restaurants- I cannot eat when it is too loud and as a kid I even ended up hiding in the restaurant bathroom because I could not tolerate the music in the restaurant. Sorry I don't really have a solution, but I can relate. Could you maybe as a compromise sometimes get a takeaway when on vacation, your partner could get what they fancied at a restaurant and you could get something too or you could just buy some bread and cheese from supermarket and have that :). That would also sort out the noise issue... I find it very understandable that eating out is super stressful