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Using Autism as an excuse

Magnolia1
over 2 years ago

My family are cross with me as they say that since I was diagnosed I am using my autism as an excuse not to change my behaviour and that am doing things now that I wouldn't have  done before and "blaming" it in on my autism. 

I don't know how to deal with this information. Do I need to pretend that I am not autistic and go back to masking and hiding who I really am? Do I need to act as if I never got a diagnosis and not mention my autism ever again? 

My husband says that he feels like he is the only one expected to change in our relationship because  now I am autistic it means that I have an excuse not to have to make any changes.

I really don't know what I am supposed to do this information or what I should do about it!

Has anyone else had this happen to them? Any advice on what I should do?

I feel like no-one is willing to accept me as I am and everyone is fed up with me being autsistic!

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

    2007-2019: My diagnosis was largely ignored. Got treated as got a learning disability by getting blamed for everything. Also tried to ask for help, supervisor said how long have you been working there? You should know by now. Asked for extra hours, told none going and gave them to her favourite people. Plus breach my adjustments. In the end had enough. Tried something new and had a massive anxiety attack. Family members told me not to say anything. Think I've got a right to say something. Plus keep on badgering me to think about my future and everyone should be working. Told me to apply for the chemist and post office as thought I would be good at it. Explained that you need Horizon experience and told me it doesn't matter. There was a vacancy going at the library and family members said 8 hours isn't enough. Also said you don't want to cut cheese and meat rest of your life. Same goes with a clothing company, you don't want to hang clothes rest of my life.

    Going to tell the Samaritans everything. also pity the doctor called it a day. How does this make me feel? Sad as give me a chance. 

  • over 1 year ago in reply to Deleted user
    There was a vacancy going at the library and family members said 8 hours isn't enough. Also said you don't want to cut cheese and meat rest of your life. Same goes with a clothing company, you don't want to hang clothes rest of my life.

    Those family members seem very overbearing about your choices in life.

    There's nothing at all wrong with cutting cheese for the rest of your life if that is what you want to do. You've mentioned visiting the cheese shop every day and that is an environment you feel comfortable in.

    The same goes for the other jobs you mentioned. There is nothing wrong with any of them. Taking a job does not commit you to doing that for the rest of your life.

    The next time one of those jobs comes up try and apply for it. Listen to your own wants and needs more and the opinion of family members will matter less.

Reply
  • over 1 year ago in reply to Deleted user
    There was a vacancy going at the library and family members said 8 hours isn't enough. Also said you don't want to cut cheese and meat rest of your life. Same goes with a clothing company, you don't want to hang clothes rest of my life.

    Those family members seem very overbearing about your choices in life.

    There's nothing at all wrong with cutting cheese for the rest of your life if that is what you want to do. You've mentioned visiting the cheese shop every day and that is an environment you feel comfortable in.

    The same goes for the other jobs you mentioned. There is nothing wrong with any of them. Taking a job does not commit you to doing that for the rest of your life.

    The next time one of those jobs comes up try and apply for it. Listen to your own wants and needs more and the opinion of family members will matter less.

Children
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