Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone. I'm 44 years old and have never sought a diagnosis for ASD although it has been suggested to me at various point throughout my life (including by my older sister who has a son with Aspergers). I have what I describe as an "obsessive personality" - when I think of something I can't let it go until I do it or some other "shiny" thing comes along (and I definitely obsess). I don't really understand other people's emotions and have always known I was "different". I don't have friends but that's never bothered me, I'd rather be alone most of the time. It was only in recent years that I realised that I never make eye contact with people and instead watch their mouth when talking to them. I've been described as "honest to the point of tactlessness" and social situations make me very very uncomfortable.
I could keep going but that's not why I am posting. I've always just labelled myself as a "geek" and see it as a positive and I wanted to know, are there benefits to seeking a formal diagnosis at my age?
The negative side of it has always worried me - what if people look at me differently either at home or at work? It's always steered me away from finding out for sure.
I think you need to decide for yourself whether a diagnosis will benefit you. It doesn’t matter what age you are. When I had my first consultation, I said I’m probably too old to bother (48), to which the psychologist said he was currently assessing a gentleman in his late 70’s!
Whether you use the NHS or go private, the choice is yours. The results are for you, and you don’t need to share them unless you wish to request some adjustments at work for example, or if you decided to apply for benefits.
I think there is a good thing to bear in mind with older age too. I think it's still the case that 1 in 3 people will develop dementia. If you can no longer adjust the world for yourself and nobody knows you are autistic, would others know you are autistic to support you?
Not fun to think about but I think it probably affects a lot of people without them even knowing, and hospitals and care homes are often the least autism-friendly settings.