Published on 12, July, 2020
I would say one of my biggest faults is jealousy.
I don't know why, but it is. I don't like it. But looking back over my life it has caused me most problems.
I don't know if jealousy is linked to autism or not.
Does any else find this a problem?
It's not specifically linked to autism because anyone can become jealous of anyone or anything. I am however, extremely jealous of those of have found jobs and by that, I mean paid permanent employment with supportive employers who understand their needs and are willing to make those necessary adjustments for the staff to carry out their duties or tasks efficiently and enthusiastically. My last paid job was back in 2006, been volunteering in different job fields since then.
Yes, I'd agree there's not a specific link. It's just that being autistic seems to have lined me and mine up for more setbacks, exclusions and disappointments. I'd say it's more to do with being sidelined due to others' behaviours, expectations and attitudes (neuronormative as they are) but this still quite often leaves me in a position of feeling like one of the have-nots.
It's now clearer to me that getting anywhere in many workplaces or even starting relationships and socialising more generally has involved a disproportionate effort and quite a bit of masking too, leaving me vulnerable to burnout and MH issues.
So yes, that general feeling of being "one-down" compared to others has fed into a certain amount of jealousy. And I'd say that the workplace can be a key area for this. Plus, given the reported level of unemployment and underemployment amongst autistic people, I think this might leave us more vulnerable to experiencing jealousy. :(