Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello. I made this new thread because there is something that is puzzling me. I don't understand something. Why do my bosses hate me? I have had several bosses that got mad at me and then yell at me. Then there was some that would throw me under the bus. They would come after me and then I would be in trouble. I didn't know what I did to make them upset like this. In my mind I didn't do anything wrong. But they are upset and I am in trouble. Then before they would get mad someone else would tell them something and then they would believe them. Instead of asking me and then finding out what happened. Then for some reason I got fired once because of that but I really quit and they ignored me when I said I quit. Then this one time and it happened just recently I would tell them what happened and then they would go back to doing that thing again where they believe what someone told them and then come after me. I don't know what is going on. I quit the job but they decided to still come after me for posting reviews about the company on the internet. They thought that we were on good terms. I don't know what that means. All I did was quit. How are we on good terms? I gave her a termination letter too. Then she said I was attacking her online but all I did was leave a review. I got a threatening text message saying they would take me to court over a review. Huh? I told my boss to leave me alone and stop texting me because I don't work with her anymore and that is when she threatened court. I was confident and assertive and there was no reason to threaten court. I was not upset. I was firm. I told her to leave me alone because she was being rude for texting me and it wasn't about work it was personal. Then my advocate that helped me get a job because of Autism agreed with the boss that threatened me and then got mad and then yelled at me over email. My advocate took my bosses side. I don't know why because my boss has been horrible to me. Then my advocate in the email said " If you have a problem work it out with her". Huh? There was no problem. But in the past I told her things and she ignored me. I quit. There is nothing to work out anymore. We weren't friends or anything. It was just a business relationship. I am done with the job and she still attacks me and stalks me because I left a review? I don't know what kind of people I am meeting but they are bad because they come after me for no reason. Also I tell people I am confused why they are upset but they just ignore me and keep asking me questions about what I did and why I did something. I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything wrong. This isn't just with customer service jobs this with all the jobs I have had. The bosses seemed to hate me and I don't know why. They get mad and yell at me and try to humiliate me on purpose in front of everyone. People often times ignore what I say. They know I want to be heard but they don't care and continue to ignore me. I had a boss say he didn't care about me. I don't know why he said this. Then he said my name wrong but he said he had a crush on someone in front of my face and he was looking at me. He yelled at me and asked me why I didn't tell him about the call one time. I am not sure why I am being mistreated like that. I don't know what I did. I am very confused about what is going on. Why are they so angry? I was going to tell him but he answered the phone and didn't want to interrupt. I was going to tell him after he got off but then he got mad and then I am confused and didn't know what he was doing. People give me BS all the time and I am sick of it. I am being bullied and I don't know why. This happened after I told them I have Autism. I am very confused. My boss thought it was funny he was mean to me and he wanted me to be scared but I wasn't. I asked him something and then he said remember the time so and so asked me about something. He was talking about me and then I only just asked him at that moment and then he said remember the time after. What the heck? I don't know what is wrong with people. He was mocking me and making fun of me? I don't know what he was doing but it was weird and didn't make sense to me. I feel like people just think I am a joke and the make fun of me. Then they act like I am some weirdo because I wanted to have a job and I am disabled.
I think you'd probably get kinder responses from NT'S than you would on here.Genuinely. I would go elsewhere rather than arguing with people.
I strongly suspect the the OP is an autobot. It's up to him/her to prove me wrong.
People on the spectrum have varying IQ's. I could quite easily rip into people to show how clever i am. But there is nothing clever about that. I find that ironic.
I didn't post to ask for help. You people aren't getting it. I posted to vent and you are all responding to my vents. It's ridiculous and doesn't make any sense to me. You are full of yourselves because you so get wrapped up in your egos and think your right all the time and you think you know everything but you don't know everything and your not right. You don't know what is going on. Just accept that your wrong and get over yourself.
So you call me dumb because you are? Then you troll me because of what I wrote about? Shame on you and your pathetic.
I think your upset I'm not telling you anything. I saw someone get upset with me because I'm not specific enough. I think everyone on here is trying to make up things about me to fill in the gaps. I don't want to tell you anything because you will go and make me the bad guy and then play the victim when your the one picking on me. It's so shameful and pathetic.
Why are you picking on me? You don't know my issues. Your just blaming me for everything that is wrong with you.
Like I said you don't know me and you can't tell me my life story just by how I write and what I talk about on here. You have no idea what I have been through and you haven't walked in my shoes. You don't know how hard I work and how how hard I don't work. You can't tell anything about me.
You haven't helped me because you hate me and you judged me for how I write sentences. Everyone on here ignores me and calls me dumb. It's horrendous. The ones that call me dumb are the ones who are dumb.
You talk bad about me to other people and turn people against me so they attack me to.
What are you talking about?
No you don't know what your talking about. You think you know me and can figure me out on the internet but you can't. Everything you just said to me has nothing ot do with me but it has more to do with yourself. You can't tell me anything about me. I didn't give you any information to go off of.
Put it this way - if Autistic individuals simply mirror society in order to learn how to communicate, Americans are actually teaching them to shutdown and lock out any ability to be open to learning, growth, becoming better. This society keeps them in chains when they're already (as I was) feral / wild... these kids are treated like animals and left to fend for themselves.
Only in the US would immigrants be put in CAGES.
GuybrushThreepwood said:Very few of us have any idea what life is like in the USA for anybody
Autists are basically ambushed daily. Americans are a bit sadistic even when nice. It's a harsh reality in the States. Everything is about money -getting diagnosed is overlooked and it's 5k to start, so families won't. Immature Americans ACT autistic so it's difficult to even begin to separate what's sociopathic vs. autistic. There is a lack of aesthetic, if not a hatred for it, one is even responded to negatively if they use queens English, as it comes across as JUST another way to dominate. It's a harsh society.
Robert123 is wrong in his assessments and there is no excuse to gang up on me like that.
How one Responds is different than an Assessment. I disagree with his lack of compassion. But this is also an open forum and... well... 'freedom of speech'. Which means freedom to take my calculations or assessment of another and respond however I wish even if it is hurtful and overlooks other elements I don't understand.
I can see how he can be confusing for you: you need step by step overly articulated responses. That would be helpful because most likely all around you, no one has ever been very clear with their words.
The problem is, most individuals Respond out of a limited understanding of things, which is Normal, but not a Wise human response. We all make assessments with the information we have. If we're not thought-full and take a pause to stop and consider "I may not have all the information even thought I think I do" we can add insult to the others injury.
Unfortunately, you've done it here as well, too - you've been taught to React not Think and ask questions. Most likely when you ask questions, you've not been taught HOW to question so that another feels your genuine confusion. But I understand you're younger will need to learn How to discuss a thing in order to create a purposeful outcome rather than a 'train wreck'.
Your talking about yourself.
This response doesn't always apply. IN another discussion another individual stated that you were wise to point this out. That perhaps applied for THAT context. "You're talking about yourself" is simply another way of saying "I'm rubber you're glue whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks on to you"... [facepalm]
That learned response "You're talking about yourself" may have been used against you at some point and therefore you may have then learned this is a tool to defend yourself with.
Every phrase we may learn from Neurotypical individuals might have been true, but it also may have been Gaslighting or a type of Manipulation to 'win' or 'end' an argument by dismantling your 'confidence'. Since there is a MASSIVE communication gap with them, it doesn't work on us, What actually happens is that you no longer trust that human.
We cannot just pull out a phrase used as a weapon and assume it is Always True. Words are difficult at best. While Robert is blunt and doesn't understand the system in the US, it will unfortunately be your job to try to communicate what is happening if you want to be understood. It's not our job unfortunately, and this sucks for all of us.
Like I've said, you've not had it easy and I can tell this just by how you're using words. And that breaks my heart.
But as you get older, if you want a better life for yourself, you will have to Work Hard to gain understanding at how your world works from a psychological perspective. And work hard to be Articulate and descriptive. And then choosing to be kind when others aren't This is much easier in the UK than in the US because it is so Incredibly Different here. Humans in the US are cruel at heart even when they think they're being kind.
Perhaps in your future posts you could write if you’re not looking for advice or help and want to vent or discuss similar experiences? If people are giving you the same advice but you don’t agree we are not ganging up on you perhaps it is a point you need to try to reflect on
I’m sorry it’s come to this epic gamer but we have been trying to help you but if you don’t understand or agree with a comment you’ve dismissed it so bluntly it can come across as rude when we only have the text to read. Things can be quite easily misinterpreted by text alone which goes back to the conversation about perceived tone in your other thread. You have to remember as well this forum is run by a UK charity, your experiences of living with autism in the USA will be quite different to most forum users so it may take some extra conversation for us to understand each other better. Very few of us have any idea what life is like in the USA for anybody
No. Forget it. I made a mistake coming on here. It doesn't seem like you guys like me and you clearly don't understand me. I was just being blunt and then people on here are upset with me. I'm dyslexic and being are calling me dumb. I would rather get help from the hospital. Goodbye.
Nobody is ganging up on you.
Tell us about yourself, your background, hobbies, family life, education, etc. So we can understand you better.
Robert123 is wrong in his assessments and there is no excuse to gang up on me like that. I can see you all turn against me because I'm different. You all hate me. I didn't do anything wrong and you all are cruel to me. I didn't do anything wrong. All of a sudden you guys are treating badly. It makes me sick.
No I don't. You don't know me. Your talking about yourself.
You're absolutely not wrong in your assessments. It's just an unfortunate set of variables. There are a lot of individuals here who've had better help in life :( I try to choose my battles as well. One can somewhat tell the level of stress in another when their ability to use language reverts to random and out-of-context use of concepts and ideas. Like only being given a handful of pre-programmed responses to defend oneself... There is a larger issue at hand and I am personally angry at not just a lack of research in the US but manipulative, coercive and biased research perpetuating this kind of mental caging of autists in the States from NT so-called 'ethics'. Lack of reasoning, lack of morals, lack of consideration, Effing individualism to incredibly selfish extremes.
You haven't done anything wrong, Robert. It's clear from their responses that the OP has issues with understanding personal agency and the reality that consequences arise from our own actions.