Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello. I made this new thread because there is something that is puzzling me. I don't understand something. Why do my bosses hate me? I have had several bosses that got mad at me and then yell at me. Then there was some that would throw me under the bus. They would come after me and then I would be in trouble. I didn't know what I did to make them upset like this. In my mind I didn't do anything wrong. But they are upset and I am in trouble. Then before they would get mad someone else would tell them something and then they would believe them. Instead of asking me and then finding out what happened. Then for some reason I got fired once because of that but I really quit and they ignored me when I said I quit. Then this one time and it happened just recently I would tell them what happened and then they would go back to doing that thing again where they believe what someone told them and then come after me. I don't know what is going on. I quit the job but they decided to still come after me for posting reviews about the company on the internet. They thought that we were on good terms. I don't know what that means. All I did was quit. How are we on good terms? I gave her a termination letter too. Then she said I was attacking her online but all I did was leave a review. I got a threatening text message saying they would take me to court over a review. Huh? I told my boss to leave me alone and stop texting me because I don't work with her anymore and that is when she threatened court. I was confident and assertive and there was no reason to threaten court. I was not upset. I was firm. I told her to leave me alone because she was being rude for texting me and it wasn't about work it was personal. Then my advocate that helped me get a job because of Autism agreed with the boss that threatened me and then got mad and then yelled at me over email. My advocate took my bosses side. I don't know why because my boss has been horrible to me. Then my advocate in the email said " If you have a problem work it out with her". Huh? There was no problem. But in the past I told her things and she ignored me. I quit. There is nothing to work out anymore. We weren't friends or anything. It was just a business relationship. I am done with the job and she still attacks me and stalks me because I left a review? I don't know what kind of people I am meeting but they are bad because they come after me for no reason. Also I tell people I am confused why they are upset but they just ignore me and keep asking me questions about what I did and why I did something. I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything wrong. This isn't just with customer service jobs this with all the jobs I have had. The bosses seemed to hate me and I don't know why. They get mad and yell at me and try to humiliate me on purpose in front of everyone. People often times ignore what I say. They know I want to be heard but they don't care and continue to ignore me. I had a boss say he didn't care about me. I don't know why he said this. Then he said my name wrong but he said he had a crush on someone in front of my face and he was looking at me. He yelled at me and asked me why I didn't tell him about the call one time. I am not sure why I am being mistreated like that. I don't know what I did. I am very confused about what is going on. Why are they so angry? I was going to tell him but he answered the phone and didn't want to interrupt. I was going to tell him after he got off but then he got mad and then I am confused and didn't know what he was doing. People give me BS all the time and I am sick of it. I am being bullied and I don't know why. This happened after I told them I have Autism. I am very confused. My boss thought it was funny he was mean to me and he wanted me to be scared but I wasn't. I asked him something and then he said remember the time so and so asked me about something. He was talking about me and then I only just asked him at that moment and then he said remember the time after. What the heck? I don't know what is wrong with people. He was mocking me and making fun of me? I don't know what he was doing but it was weird and didn't make sense to me. I feel like people just think I am a joke and the make fun of me. Then they act like I am some weirdo because I wanted to have a job and I am disabled.
I don't remember asking for advice.
By posting your problems with life, on this forum, you are implicitly asking for advice.
@robert123 I think there's more problems here. I may write a post on the horrors of American society and how severely abusive it is to AS individuals. Help is not available to the poor. Add how uneducated…
It's difficult to give advice because I don't know all the facts.
You could start by separating your personal life from your professional life. Once you left a company don't slag them off on the…
Just out of curiosity, what country are you in? For instance, it seems in some places people are more receptive to the differences Autism presents.
There's not anything specific in what you're describing here, so it's difficult to work out what's happened. It is usually best when ending a situation of any sort to put a good deal of time and space between oneself and anything to do with a company, so maybe it wasn't best to leave a review, even if you felt it wasn't unkind. Distance or silence is useful to have a clear picture about time spent somewhere - I've sometimes needed years to reflect before I know how to talk about it even if enjoyable. But even when things go wrong, it's sometimes best to just walk away and only talk to a therapist or with friends, or write things down for myself. And if there's some activity that warrants calling the police or hiring a lawyer, again, these matters are better held in private for a period of time.
In the States, I've noticed people who don't realise Autism isn't Downs syndrome - they seem to be very behind in research and awareness. I've also noticed there is a lack of Affording Dignity. And when one is continually not afforded small matters of kindness, or not spoken to with dignity and respect, it can be hard to learn how to unless coming from a wealthier class where a certain amount of manners are expected and exchanged and taught.
Also, does this page help with some explanations at all? www.instagram.com/.../
Huh? I am confused because I think what I did was fine and I did what any person would do. I left a review to warn people because my boss is strange and doesn't know what she is doing. How my advocate and my former boss reacted was out of line and uncalled for. I leave reviews all the time and no one else has had a problem before and no one else stalks and or comes after me threatening court. I told my friends and my girlfriend. All they just told me was that my boss and advocate were weird and that I should block all contact with them. I did just that. That was it. I was just confused about their behavior and why they acted that way over such a petty thing. My girlfriend and my friends also told me that they are crazy and it is their problem and I shouldn't worry about it anymore after I blocked them. They are receptive in the USA and that probably explains why I have been treated poorly by other people. I was just stating my opinion and they attacked me for freedom of speech. They were in the wrong with how they reacted and they stalked me. I am living in Vail,Colorado in the USA. Yeah that page does help with some explanations.
Every Freedom we have holds a type of responsibility.
There's Freedom To and Freedom From.
There is a type of absolute freedom, like something adrift in Space. I wouldn't want that kind of freedom.
Most people have Freedom From (in the case of protections and human rights). Most don't have Freedom To, as one needs money, but no amount of money will make certain crimes legal. Jeff Bezos would still go to prison if he killed someone.
Many freedoms are earned, but then I might not call them freedom.
Freedom of speech is a funny one. Because words can shape others. They can destroy or build. It's amazing how someone can be careless or ruthless with their words. It's amazing how much power words can have - when a Judge proclaims a sentence, those words have a grave sort of power. Or when someone gets married. We don't often think about what words can do, but in more recent years, professors are getting fired, their lives and careers ruined because someone has accused them of a thing and EVEN if it's wrong or they are proven innocent, the 'echo' of those words has created a Death By Association.
Death by Association is a very Neurotypical... navigation system? I don't know how to describe how woven into NT thinking and perceiving reality, but it is not part of Autistic thinking. We can separate a good part of a thing from a bad because Autistic thinking tends to be more about observing, there's always a degree of separation. But for a NT, if a bottle of wine comes from a vineyard with the same name as a slave owner from 1792 and a pub I frequent suddenly has that wine, and I'm NT, I may decided Never to go to that pub ever again. Why? Because they're associated with slave trade.
That's NT thinking: Death by Association.
So now, what is freedom of speech? Initially an idea that communities have a right to know ALL the information the press can gather so we can make informed decisions about a thing. Unfortunately, what I've experienced is that people feel they also have a right to open their mouths without even thinking or without gathering all the information and say whatever they like, even if it's out of context or incorrect or ruins someone's life. That's horrifying. That's no longer a freedom but an act of violence or negligence.
There's a lot more to this! It's worth looking into. I grew up in the US. I now live in England and don't wish to go back - and this is one particular reason. I discovered at some point words are used to command not connect. They are often used out of context and thoughtlessly. If you spend time in literature or classic essays from the turn of the century, Like George Orwell's essays (Books Vs. Cigarettes is a good one), there's an entirely different respect for the use of Speech. The older I have become the more I have grown to love the freedom to withhold. The human right to be forgotten (but that's the EU, not the US, sadly).
What you've shared here concerning work would be classified as employment discrimination, treating you with inequality not letting you have your say and taking others for granted.
Concerning your review, if your review contained anything discrediting and that could prevent people using their organisation it is against the law and called "slandering", even if someone's review is entirely true it will be classified as "slandering" as long as the information has not been proven true in court.
If someone caught their manager breaking a law and reported to the police, if that information of the manager breaking a law is put in the public eye before the police receive evidence it would be classified as "slandering" even though the information would be true.
That is probably why your advocate to the employer's side.
You could start by separating your personal life from your professional life. Once you left a company don't slag them off on the internet, even if what you say is a true opinion.
I don't understand what you just said. I didn't slag anyone. I know you don't have all the facts. I will keep doing what I did because what I did was fine. I didn't do anything wrong. I don't think anyone understands me and that's ok. You have to be your own best friend in this world. I get it. Because it looks to me like people are against me on this matter. Huh? I don't remember asking for advice.
I'm not sure if the law is the same in the USA as it is in the UK, but in the UK you are entitled to post a review about a company. But, if the company (or anyone you have mentioned in the review) believes what you have written to be false, slanderous or libellous, then they have the right to bring legal proceedings against you for defamation. It might be worth looking again at your review and removing any statements about the company (or its staff) that could be considered as defamatory.
I took it down and a lawyer said it was moot. I blocked contact with the boss and the advocate because they were attacking me and I didn't do anything.
How are they attacking you? By text? And who is this advocate? Why are they involved? Generally speaking, employers don't want to keep in contact with employees once they have left. Did you know them outside of work?