Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm an autistic adult that is only partially verbal/cannot hold a job due to my autism and I have experienced a lot of infantilization as a result. It's affected me to the extent that I've begun to feel ashamed of having a sexual identity at all, and subconsciously comparing it to sexualizing a child. It's affecting my ability to be intimate with my partner. Does anyone else feel this way? How have you managed it?
Yes. It feels exploitative and abusive, similar to pedophilia, when people are sexual with me. I dealt with it by putting a no sex boundary in place with my partner and coming out as asexual a couple of years ago. Much happier now.
Do you feel unable to do that because you're financially dependent on your partner? i.e. you don't really have the option to refuse sex in case it results in them leaving you which could put your physical survival at risk?
I was scared about that too and assumed I'd end up homeless or dead, but things came to a head when I had a meltdown which meant I couldn't go on with things as they were. It's been two years and so far things are holding together. My partner has been helping me find independence and I'm a lot more able to work without the stress of a sexual relationship affecting my mental health.
so just to be clear. you do in fact view your sexuality as child like? and think that other adults should infantilise you (in terms of your sexual autonomy / sex life)?
I'm not trying to have a go. I totally get the idea of being asexual / disinterested in sex but thats quite different from thinking of your self as child like for sexual purposes? That's a very unusual point of view. Not one I think most autistic people, verbal or otherwise, would agree with.
Well this is a thread for people who do feel that way. Is your back button broken?
When you have no relevant experience of the feelings experienced by a poster asking a question, you are allowed to scroll past. I know you think your opinion on everything is so important it can't possibly not be shared, but honestly sweetie, it really isn't.