Published on 12, July, 2020
Covid-19 has disrupted many peoples lives and some are not lucky enough to be here so I have found it difficult to communicate my struggles while there are people worse off , I just felt I wasn’t entitled to be finding things hard.
I still do feel that I dont have the right to be unhappy and think this is why I have took it out on myslef. Everything is just different so I have no routine and seem to be thinking about the rules and who’s breaking them and am I doing it right all the time it is just really exhausting. I have engaged in some self harm which I am ashamed of but at the time it really helped me cope, whilst I am sat thinking about how silly I have been it has got me thinking if self harm is something common within autism. I have never done this until a couple of years ago something happened which felt like my world fell apart and this was something that helped, at the time I hadn’t got my diagnosis.
I think what I am trying to ask is does anybody else do this?, why would I suddenly do this out of the blue if it is a trait of my autism and also if you have done this have you found something else that helps instead. I just feel a little lost at the min and whilst I have no intention of doing something ultra dangerous I do worry things could progress later down the line.
sorry for the ramble, I am finding it difficult to articulate things at the min
Hello XIV,
I’m sorry you are going through such a tough time, it’s good that you’ve let us know what’s happening/how you feel.
The Samaritans provide confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day on 116 123, or by email on jo@samaritans.org.
MIND have information pages on coping with self harm or suicidal feelings based on the experiences of people who’ve been through it that you may find helpful.
If you are very close to doing something to hurt yourself - call 999 now or go to your nearest A&E department. There should be someone there to support you and make sure you get ongoing support.
If you need help with an autism related issue, our helpline can be emailed via webform https://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main/questions.aspx or they’re open from 10am – 12pm and 1pm - 3pm, Monday to Friday ,0808 800 4104.
Take care,
Elena Mod
Thank you
Ive already done the damage and the nurse patched me up. I’m just trying to work out why they saying this is because of my autism when I didnt do it prior to diagnosis. The dr was the one who suggested i do this to help cope providing i dont go too far and if I cant sort myself to get medical professionals to patch me up. I have now got a different doctor at the same place who i dont think agrees, the nurse was really nice and explained they no it happens and not to worry. She also agreed to not tell my new doctor. I wish I wasn’t diagnosed with autism not many people know but those that do treat me like I’m 5 and other people just think i am wired
Corona is not helping because i feel like I’m always breaking the rules and shopping seems so hard, i keep getting trapped in shops where you cant go down a row and if i get overwhelmed I cant find my way out like I used to.
I was hoping to hear from some people who may do the same as me and find out if it helps them too, also is this an autism thing and was my doctor right in telling me to do this