Ways to Cope

Aww you are so kind. Sorry you are not on top form, I will read the link I just need to be more focused. 

I don’t mean this in a bad way but it is good to talk to somebody that has actually done it and sort of understands. You seem so spot on, I struggle to express my emotions and if I donT always understand what the emotion is, this frustrates me so can see why it leads to harm. I don’t like it but I have stood up in front of lots of clients to deliver a presentation but on the flip side a lady who worked at my drs was talking to me and I was nervous and adgitated for no reason.

your right the NHS isn’t perfect but in most they do a good job. One of the things I think that is playing on my mind is I saw on social media a secret recording of somebody needing help and been treat really badly. I didn’t know the person but complete coincidence the person refusing to help and been extremely difficult and rude was a MH nurse that I had issues with. Nobody believed me when I said what she had done to me and now somebody has a recording. It’s made me think about how bad it was for me at the time. On Friday the nurse couldn’t have been better with me so non judgmental and even made a joke or 2 to make me feel better. She also asked if she could touch me / give me a hug and I refused. I dont like physical contact but what I liked was she asked and just didn’t dive on me.

Thank you again, I’m sure I will be ok soon. I hope you mate too

take care 

I am also not on top form at the moment so I'm sorry my post was not written that well.  I supplied the link because I was too tired to summarise the article.  It was just to backup that I had read about the connection in a scholarly source rather than making it up.   

I do understand because I've self harmed as well and I have a decent job, I think the self harm is due to inability to express my emotions and my inability to go to the doctor to talk about depression, and the fear that I will be put on meds that make me gain weight. (I self harm when i experience conflicts, decision "crossroad"s or punishing myself for weight).

Maybe what I should have said was: you have a right to get help so that you don't have to resort to self-harm.   You have a right to say: here is a line,  self harm is stepping over the line, please help me to find another way to get relief. In a perfect NHS world this would be available and I know it's not perfect, but you don't have to accept the need to harm yourself as a solution.   

Please take care.   

Hi

thank you for the link, I looked at it briefly but my heads not very focussed at the min. I know you don’t agree with the dr but what’s odd is the new dr I’ve been give I don’t think agrees with the old dr so it makes it a little awkward.

I had some bloods due and the nurse noticed the damage even though I’d hidden it and she was really good. She didn’t make a deal of it and didn’t make me feel bad. She just said we know this happens don’t worry I will patch you up and won’t tell your dr. I think she did that as I’m struggling having a new dr with different opinions, I keep thinking I’m doing things wrong .

one thing I can’t get my head around is how I can run businesses and solve issues for people with struggling businesses with my eyes closed so I guess people class this as fairly successful but then on the other side I am hurting myself. It’s like I’m too different people. I feel bad after I’ve done it which is a circle as i should be punished so I do it again. I feel so much better after I’ve done it, until I realise I’ve been an idiot again. I also feel embarrassed talking about it so not sure I can contact anybody for help 

thank you for taking time to reply to me it is appreciated, I wish I was normal whatever normal is

Hi

I think your doctor was very wrong to suggest this.   Self-harm can be correlated with autism due to the anxiety or the tendancy to get distressed and feel "stuck".  It is a sign of depression.  Here is a link to an article which says it better than I can:

https://molecularautism.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13229-019-0267-3

Self-harm can happen in episodes and you may be doing it because your fight-or-flight reflex used to allow you to do something else, that you were less conscious of,  or for some reason (eg lockdown maybe) you are feeling rooted to the spot or more lonely, etc. and this is what you turn to. Or you might even be more depressed than you were, hence take up self-harm.

I would recommend you speak to another doctor and get help such as talking therapy, to deal with the dark thoughts that cause you to self-harm: I don't want to write trigger-y comments here and I especially dont' want to turn this into a pro-self-harm forum but, lets just say, self harm feels like a relief at the time, but it can be a slippery slope to something worse.

Thank you

Ive already done the damage and the nurse patched me up. I’m just trying to work out why they saying this is because of my autism when I didnt do it prior to diagnosis. The dr was the one who suggested i do this to help cope providing i dont go too far and if I cant sort myself to get medical professionals to patch me up. I have now got a different doctor at the same place who i dont think agrees, the nurse was really nice and explained they no it happens and not to worry. She also agreed to not tell my new doctor. I wish I wasn’t diagnosed with autism not many people know but those that do treat me like I’m 5 and other people just think i am wired 

Corona is not helping because i feel like I’m always breaking the rules and shopping seems so hard, i keep getting trapped in shops where you cant go down a row and if i get overwhelmed I cant find my way out like I used to.

I was hoping to hear from some people who may do the same as me and find out if it helps them too, also is this an autism thing and was my doctor right in telling me to do this 

Hello XIV,

I’m sorry you are going through such a tough time, it’s good that you’ve let us know what’s happening/how you feel.

The Samaritans provide confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day on 116 123, or by email on jo@samaritans.org.

 MIND have information pages on coping with self harm or suicidal feelings based on the experiences of people who’ve been through it that you may find helpful. 

 If you are very close to doing something to hurt yourself - call 999 now or go to your nearest A&E department. There should be someone there to support you and make sure you get ongoing support.

 If you need help with an autism related issue, our helpline can be emailed via webform https://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main/questions.aspx or they’re open from 10am – 12pm and 1pm - 3pm, Monday to Friday ,0808 800 4104. 

Take care,

Elena Mod

Hi Symon

im clumsy too, I always bump into things and fall over. I just laugh now and so do my friends.

the S/H is something that I was once accused of a few years back when I had a tough time and my dr told me it was a good way to deal with things. I took their advice and when I got things wrong I used it to punish myself. I haven’t done anything for years but feel I keep making mistakes with all these new rules so have started punishing myself again, I understood from what dr said this is what autistic people do but I never did it previously. I have always been autistic just notbdiagnosed  

Hi , If you are feeling thoughts of s/h please just talk to someone ,the samaritans can help just to talk or contact your mental health team .

 I am constantly bumping into things and cutting myself by mistake but that is part of the spacial awareness difficulty some of us have   .

I did have really bad depression with dark thoughts ,but talking therapy has helped me build a strong toolkit in my mind to combat those deep dark thoughts when they surface .

I am on the 2nd round of cbt post diagnosis and all my therapist is doing is teaching me to meditate ,this has been my eureka moment as when my mind fell silent for the first time It was a very very very very very nice place to be .

Take care x