Published on 12, July, 2020
I got my aspergers diagnosis in January this year aged 38. I have had the same group of girl friends since I was 18 (from university) and I feel ready to tell them. Partly to help to explain some of my behaviour over the years and partly as a "thanks" for sticking around and putting up with me!
I think they will be surprised. At my assessment /diagnosis the psychologist said I was one of the best 'maskers' he'd ever seen.
Up until now I've only told my family (including inlaws) and one work colleague who is probably my closest friend since we spend so much time together. They were all surprised. My husband is the only person who wasnt at all surprised!
Sometimes I think they are only surprised because I don't look or behave (outwardly) like what they perceive as a "typical" autistic person!
Don't think I can face doing it in person (there's 8 of us) so I'm going to post it in a private group we have.
Up until now I've only told my family and my work colleague who is probably my closest friend since we spend so much time together.
Can anybody give me any advice or share their experience?
Any help much appreciated
Don’t tell them on social media - private group or not.
I would be weary of telling them face to face too. Most will just invalidate your words and experience with the usual one liners.
One friend of mine - who would often come to me for help with various problems from woodwork to car mechanics. Now he doesn’t ask anymore and if I try and advice he doesn’t listen because he now sees me as ‘retarded’ some how or broken.
I've known these girls more than half my life and I'm not concerned about any negative reactions at all.
We've all been through alot together. I think they will be supportive and understanding (or else I would never tell them)
These are my closest friends and I feel I can tell them anything.
I have many, many friends that I will never tell, for exactly all the reasons you mentioned!
Me too - the guy who doesn’t take my advice anymore. I’ve known him for 36 years.
You said "woodwork" and "mechanics" so my brain automatically assumed you were male. I have surprised myself here, (whether you are male or female) as I do think it's important to challenge gender stereotypes. Oh well, no one's perfect.