Published on 12, July, 2020
I managed to get through school, and university. My social skills are okay, and when I've been in workplaces for work experience etc, I have done pretty well. But can I get through the interviews process? i think there is an inbuilt discrimination against people like me at the interview stage since I make bad eye contact, and find them hellish. I'm now in my forties, and none of the jobs I have ever done have ever had reasonable pay or required an interview. My CV is woeful even though my intelligence level is clearly above average. (Not genius level, granted!) I do have some issues, but can function at a high level, yet no one wants me.
What do I do? Even when I've done careers courses, I struggle, and get panic attacks. Yet, I know I can do certain types of work because I have already. Working is not too bad for me. Looking for work has made me feel suicidal. I am lucky I have some level of other support, but this is not enough to pay a lot of my bills and my gas has been cut off.
The really annoying thing is that I got offered a dream job at a bookshop, and turned it down because I was going out of the country for a few months. I have been kicking myself ever since.
Half the time some stranger speaks to me, they ask me what I do for a living. I'm not into the whole peeing contest aspect of that, but I would like to be able answer something other than telling them undiagnosed ASD has stopped me from ever getting a proper job.
I'm really sorry to hear you've had a tough time. The interview process can be really tough and isn't an inclusive process in a lot of cases.
If you've had some success with the bookshop, you could explore whether any other bookshops in the area are hiring.
Whilst your job hunting, could you do some voluntary work - even if it's just a few hours a week - to bulk up your CV and get you a strong character reference for future job applications?
It's also worth considering whether you have any skills, hobbies or interests that'd enable you to freelance/be self-employed. If you'd like to, feel free to note some down here and we can have a think about them :)
I have done voluntary work in the past, but it is a mixed bag and it doesn't pay. When I was at a charity shop they shoved me on the till, which was sometimes okay, sometimes not.
The two things that really put me off it were:
* I got asked point blank by one employer whether I was being paid by them, and when I said "no", they made it clear they weren't interested. This wasn't even for a fancy job, but clearly voluntary work experience was as good as none to them.
* I did charity work because I wanted to give something back. Instead I felt like I was doing unpaid work for a business and not helping improve society.
I worked in that charity shop for several years. I don't feel I got much out of it in the end up... Certainly nothing for my career, even though I was definitely doing a form of work.