Published on 12, July, 2020
As I've got older - 22 now - I've found that people don't really like me. At work people smile and chat sometimes but I always feel an awkwardness atmosphere.. at school I had no friends, people never wanted to be around me despite me trying many times to talk and make new friends . I'm curious as to whether you have any friends and if you notice if people like or avoid you. At work I get spoken to but it feels forced and I just feel really sad because I'm alone and no one wants to get to know me and like me.
I'm a fun friendly girl, I'm thin could possibly eat a bit more but I try my best. I have dreams of becoming a mum someday and settling down with someone, but I just don't see that happening. Is there something wrong with me because I'm like a plague which everyone avoids.
Hello A, sorry to read you have experienced this and are feeling this way; no there is nothing wrong with you, it is highly likely that the people you come into contact with do not feel equipped themselves. Younger people find it particularly difficult to relate with anyone they percieve as different to them, ideally they need to recognise this and develop their skills - this usually comes with a bit of age and experience. You could also develop your social skills to try and build on how you communicate with others. Social skills are not something we can aquire and tick off the list as done; it takes many years of practice for everyone to develop these skills - its kind of ongoing for a long time; also, if you dont socialise for a while, it can feel like starting all over again sometimes.
Have you tried joining any groups in your area to be among other people on the spectrum? Guess it kind of helps sometimes to be with those who get it.
Hi, i am so very sorry for the delay in responding to you. I hope you don't think I was being rude. I only just saw this comment.
Thank you so much for your response, I really appreciate it . I think my social skills are very bad, they always have been. The only person I really connected well with was my mum. I struggled to connect with my dad, but with mum it was easy, she was lovely.Sadly now my skills of socialising seem even worse, I find it hard to talk to anybody.
I haven't looked to be honest, but I fear I'd have a panic attack if I joined a group. Although it would be nice to get to know some people on the spectrum. I am very lonely. My problem now, I think, is my mum was the only person who really understood me and now she's gone, it's so hard.
Astridlora. X
Oh A, so sorry to read you have lost your mum and bestie, she sounds great. Hey, everyone only really needs one or two friends - any more can be a bit of a head ache to be honest! Don't give up but at the same time don't try to hard either, a true friend likes you for being you. Yes it takes courage to go to new things for sure, but you may find you like it, and if not, try something else. You can do this, you only need to be brave for one night! Hugs x
I wish you could have known her, she was amazing! She was kind, caring and helped me through so many difficult times and she had a beautiful singing voice and would give me cuddles which made all my troubles go away if I was stressed or struggling. she was so lovely .
Thank you for your advice. I'll look into local groups, but I won't push myself either so hopefully won't put too much pressure or stress on me.
Hugs back x.
Astridlora.