Published on 12, July, 2020
I sometimes find other people's perceptions of a situation absolutely baffling. And a recent situation is really bugging me because I really don't see how the other people's point of view made sense yet I was on my own with my point of view so evidently once again its me with the issue.
I'm quite protective of my possessions. They are very important to me. I guess this is an ASC thing. Because of this, I HATE lending people things. However, I found myself in a situation where a friend wanted to read a book I'd just read and asked if they could borrow it. I said they could even though I didn't really want to because I didn't want to appear like I was being awkward. She read the book and then said another friend who I also know had wanted to read it so she would pass it on to her. I was a bit uneasy about this but nothing I could do.
I let time go by for a bit and heard nothing about the book so asked the second friend if they'd read it yet. She said the first friend never gave it to her. I asked the first friend the next time I saw her. There was a group of us. She was very offhand and didn't seem to know whether she still had it or not. As the conversation went on, she quite bluntly said "Well did you want it back?" I said "Of course I did because it was mine." She seemed baffled by this. Someone else said "Well you're never going to read it again." And then another person said "If I leant someone a book, I'd just expect them to keep it."
My mind at this point was just repeatedly going "It's mine! It's mine! It's mine!" I couldn't even slightly understand their point of view at all. They didn't see why I had an issue with the situation. Am I the only one baffled by this situation? And does anyone else find themselves in these situations where there point of view is different but the other people's point of views make absolutely no sense?
Another thing - NTs break stuff and then they can’t even see that they’ve broken something. There perception is Soooooooo different they can’t realky see what’s in front of theirs eyes. So if they borrow a high end pair of sunglasses and scratch the hell out of the lenses - THEY CANT EVEN SEE the scratches. Honestly they can’t tell.
DO NOT TOUCH is a sign they are used to seeing.
NTs have Butter Fingers and are half blind
Not being picky but not all of us are like this, some of us are genuinely caring people who hold the same set of values you and others describe, if you loan an item it should be treated with respect and returned in the same condition.
I appreciate that, sorry if that was the impression I gave you, only meant that I believe everyone should get things back that they lend in the same condition! And that it is perfectly acceptable to get angry if you don't, I know I certainly do!
I'm sure there are plenty of nts that return things and plenty of people with autism who don't. I think my post was more about was my reaction down to autism or was that a normal reaction for anyone rather than it asking whether the other people's behaviour was due to them being nt. I'm not into the whole them and us mentality.