Published on 12, July, 2020
HI,
My 27 year old son who has Aspergers still blames me (and my husband) for the past mistakes made when he was growing up. This was before he was diagnosed (he was diagnosed quite late) and to certain extent afterwards while we were still adjusting to it. He keeps watching videos on FB where all those 'perfect' parents and psychologists talk about flexibility, inclusion and what needs to happen in supporting people with autism, all nicely presented and wrapped in loveliness ... and he keeps referring to times many years ago when I sometimes have lost tho plot or when I didn't know how to deal with the situation. Even though years have passed and we have really good relationship, when this particular topic comes up he gets really vicious and calls me names for things that happened in the past. I did try to explain why and how things happened and that we didn't know etc etc, but he is having none of it.This is really hurtful and I do take it. But it really pains me that this is still happening.
Has anyone else experienced this and do you have any advice?
Hi there,
It's clear that he's still naive to how parenting works. The truth is, no one is perfect at parenting, but most people do their very best to bring up their children, and that's all anyone can do. It's easy to point fingers when you haven't done it yourself, but once he matures and starts looking after children, he'll come to his senses x
Much love <3
I have been through this. I have Asperger's Syndrome. I was only diagnosed three years ago, at the age of 31. I get frustrated with having the condition and with struggling to get support, and because I wish that I had been diagnosed and had more support as a child. I have taken it out on my parents too. It must be very difficult for them seeing me having panic attacks, overloads and meltdowns. I find it difficult to calm down from them too.